Omar's Diary 21st April 2018
By Alan Russell
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Grand National Success - Trump - Tony Benn - Henry Kissinger - Flat Racing
Well, I must say that I was extremely pleased at five thirty last Saturday. My Servants and I sat and watched the 2018 Grand National and two of my selections came in the first four places. Tiger Roll was first at 10/1 and Anibale Fly was fourth, also at 10/1.
Lady and Man Servant were very pleased as well as they both had small wagers and I believe they manged to double their money on a meagre investment. I refer to their level of investment as ‘meagre’ for very good reason. When Man Servant returned from the turf accountants with the winnings I was presented with a brand new yellow banana as my share of the winning’s. Now, I am fully aware that a yellow banana costs between six and seven pounds so if my share was that much, the amount my Servants staked must have been very small indeed. Oh well, a win is a win and a profit is a profit but I must say with those odds I was expecting just a little more than a new yellow banana.
There was a suggestion that the Servants should buy me some tiger prawns to help celebrate my success but to date none have appeared; just a yellow banana.
Last week I predicted that because my Servants had moved their equines to a yard nearer home that Mitsie and I would see less of them. My prediction was as accurate as my Grand National selections. Sunday they were away with the equines for quite a bit of the day. On Monday evening they were at the stables until sunset. On Tuesday Lady Servant was travelling and Man Servant was away riding until nearly nine that evening. He looked happy but exhausted Wednesday evening he did stay at home, probably to recover from Tuesday, but on Thursday and Friday evenings both of them were at the stables and most likely doting on their equines. I may sound a bit bitter about this but I am not really as my Servants are at last able to enjoy their equines again after a very difficult time with them.
When they do return from the stables I feign a degree of displeasure with them. When they bend down to speak to me or try to pick me up for a cuddle I pretend to be a bit scratchy with them and walk away. Deep down I am very happy for them both.
Last night, Friday, Man Servant and I retired to the library here in Omar Towers and read some of The Spectator. There seemed to be an awful lot of mention of a member of the servant species called ‘Trump’ who is something to do with America. On Page ten there is a rather gross caricature of ‘Trump’ holding and clutch of missiles under his arm and showing him wearing his trademark red tie. How gauche? Such attire would not be allowed in some of the establishments I have frequented.
The headline is ‘Countdown to War’. I do hope not for everyone’s sake. As the late Tony Benn said ‘War is the ultimate failure of diplomacy’. I think that is very true but diplomacy will always fail if one or more of the parties involved in conflict do not want to engage in dialogue openly or through what Henry Kissinger calls ‘back channels’ before what is happening in Syria engulfs the wider Middle East region and potentially the wider world.
Felines do not engage in politics of the sort going on in the Middle East. The nearest Mitsie and I have got to playing politics has been over who gets to sleep where and who can win the most attention from the Servants. We are never reduced to open conflict and heaven forbid if any innocents ever got injured in these relatively passive internecine feline disputes.
The Grand National last weekend is regarded as the end of the National Hunt season here in the UK. That season officially ends on 28th April at Sandown Park when the champion jockey and trainer receive their well-deserved accolades and plaudits. The 2018 flat season started in late March/early April but really gets underway on 5th and 6th of May with the running of the 1000 Guineas and 2000 Guineas races at Newmarket over a mile giving three year olds a chance to throw down their gauntlets to any other equine that wants to take them on.
Felines do not compete like that for two reasons. One is that we are not competitive and two such an activity would involve endless hours of exercise and quite frankly, I would prefer to be lying down in the sun after a good lunch rather than covering endless miles to get fit. And even if I did compete and win I would jolly well expect a bit more of a reward than the occasional yellow banana.
I will be working very hard over the next couple of weeks studying the form of the entrants for these two races and will endeavour to supply you with some recommendation. Don’t listen to anything Man Servant says as apparently the only thing he can tip is rubbish at the moment. If that research proves inconclusive then I will have to engage Mitsie’s services and use her in my ‘litter tray’ method.
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penultimate paragraph made
penultimate paragraph made me laugh our loud. Don't tell Omar
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