Big deal (IP)

A bead of sweat rolls into my eye, blurring my vision. I shake my head and blink it away. I can feel the faces round the table watching, waiting.

Yet again I check the cards, lifting the edges, ignoring the impatient muttering. I should never have gotten into this, but too late now; I’m in too deep and it all hangs on this hand. I look one more time to be sure.

Nine, ten, Jack and Queen of spades. And the five of diamonds. All or nothing. I take a deep breath and push the five face down across the table.

“One,” I say, my voice hoarse.

“At last,” cries Danny, “one card for our cautious friend Phil. Voila!”

He casually flicks the top card from the pile across to me. It spins to a stop by my hand and for a moment I can’t look at it, my hand refuses to move. Then, slowly, I slide the card to the edge of the table. I pause for a moment, then turn the corner up.

I look, then carefully lay it flat again. My brain has failed to retain what my eyes saw so I lift the corner again. A black ‘K’ and a spade. The King of spades. A straight flush. I focus on keeping my expression neutral.

“Oh, Philip likes what he sees,” Danny cackles loudly, then turns to Debbie. “And how many for you, Deborah?”

Debbie takes two and Aaron takes three. Fiona takes one, looks at it, then wrinkles her pretty nose and smiles ruefully. She pulls nervously at her top. I try not to stare at her cleavage.

Kevin leans forward and pats his cards. “I think I’ll stick with these, actually.” He grins at me, showing his perfect teeth, then drapes an arm casually over Fiona’s shoulders. Let’s see how smug you are when you see my cards, Kev.

“Okay, and just one for the dealer,” Danny deals himself a card and winces. “Ow, no good. Right, Philip, show us what you got.”

I allow myself a small smile as I turn my cards over, enjoying the little gasps round the table. Debbie flings her hand in, just a pair of fours, Aaron drops the King of clubs to the table. Fiona fans out three eights.

“It’s between Phil and Kev. Tense stuff,” Danny proclaims. “Let’s see ‘em, Kev.”

Kevin’s smile is fixed on his face. He locks his eyes on mine as he slowly fans his cards out. Ten, Jack, Queen, King, Ace. All hearts. Royal flush. Unbeatable.

My mouth goes dry. I can’t believe it. I think for a mad moment about just grabbing my stuff and running out. Why on earth did I agree to play? I realise I’m shaking my head.

“Come on Phil, you can’t get out of it. You lost, now you have to pay.” Kevin’s patronising tone sets my teeth on edge.

“You don’t have to, if you don’t want to, you know?” Fiona, so kind, so sweet.

“Oh yes, he does,” Kevin puts his hand over her mouth. “Show us what you got, Philip.”

I stand up, the cold air on my skin, my bare knees knocking together. I hook my thumbs into the waistband of my underpants. I pause, thinking how I will never be able to look Fiona, or any of them, in the eye again. Then I pull them down and stand up, bracing myself for the laughter.

There is silence. I look down at the floor, waiting for this to be over.

“Jesus.” Danny breaks the silence.

“Alright, it’s just a normal... thing,” I splutter.

“That,” Kevin says, “is not normal.” He whistles.

“Alright, you’ve had your fun.” I pull my underpants up and start pulling the rest of my clothes on. “I’m going home now.”

Fiona catches me in the hall. “Phil, wait.”

I shake her off me. “I’m not looking for sympathy, thanks.”

“Sympathy? What? Why would I give you sympathy?”

“Well, because, you know...?” I catch sight of Debbie looking at me through the living room door. She winks at me and mouths something that looks like “Wow.”

Confused, I look back to Fiona who is staring at me with a funny expression on her face. She leans close and whispers, “Call me,” then turns and goes back into the living room.

I stand there, my mouth open. Did that just really happen? And did she really squeeze my bum?

I really hope so.