Four Postcards From Goa

WATCHING

tourists lurking in the bamboo jungle
staking out the waterholes
eyes glued for a glimpse of golden oriole

natives lurking in the beachbar jungle
staking out the water's edge
eyes glued for a glimpse of golden areola

SNAKEBITE

"Two Kingfisher, please," I said to the waiter.
He was gone an inordinate length of time
and came back with two small cobalt-blue birds
tethered to a twig.

"This isn't at all what I wanted," I complained,
and, like a fool,
ordered two Cobra instead.

OUCH

Whilst my wife was shopping for fabric in Mapusa
I bought a copy of the "Kama Sutra"
- illustrated version!
I was showing it to that nice girl from Derby
reclining on a sunbed
asking her to recommend a favourite position
when my wife returned early.

The karma instantly worsened
and, at the clinic,
the sutures soon followed.

VALUE

The lime soda cost twenty rupees,
more than the waiter would earn in an hour.

On our last evening we pigged out at the Delhi Darbar;
although it cost a fraction of the price back home
the meal amounted to two weeks' wages for a waiter.

At the airport next day the customs men drew me aside:
"What's in that big suitcase?" they asked.
"A waiter," I confessed.