P-P-P "Pick-Up-A-Penguin" True

Cherry

By Cavalcader

Sat, 06 Feb 2010
  • 2739 reads
14 comments
 

I have a lovely nylon fur jacket
Given to me
By our wonderful daughter ,free.
Her friend gave it to her as a present

From Canada, I do believe.
It is a dream
But not her scene.

When I wear it about
One young man called out:
"I like your coat- most have
Cat's and dog's on."

I said: "Thankyou, and in another shop
Whales and wolves too."
Mine is sky blue and white
With all penguins on all over.

Black open beaks, some have fish in
Others looking up for more.
Even my favourite cat outside
Likes to snuggle up and sit beside me
to feel the warmth.

It zippers up nearly to the top of my neck
With long snowy white fleck sleeves
I like chocolate biscuit penguins
To dunk in my tea
Because of my awful teeth.

A big white seagull pecking the ground
Up our path
But it's never seen a jacket with penguins on.
That really makes me laugh.
this is try out true

all comments please all comments
I like to be corrected punctuation
and what stanza where! please grammatically rough.

Dear Tony, managed to alter it now through
all your kind help and correction punctuation
and capitals, reads and flows thousand times better.Yours is much better thankyou correcting it.And definitely your's better version.
You deserve the cherry!Wow.
Thankyou so much.
Cheers!
julie x

Certificate U
Poem
Humour

Comments

Submitted by Beeme on
I really enjoyed this Julie, it made me laugh. I particularly like the last stanza :) Beeme xx

k.

Submitted by Cavalcader on
new Beeme Hope your well. Well I tried.I tried make it funny true I have jacket.Thankyou lovely comment. You know you can do better than this go on? I use this like chat! comment mustn't. Paper states degree people cleverer own cats instead of dogs' Bristol Uni: say No! Mine are two know all's Oh! yes one has 3 cats.0W! Counts me out. Cold. Look foreward reading more of yours and all. Iv'e just told "Silver-spun-sand" have a debate on Abctales over cats.Some cats cleverer than us I think.In ways. julie xx

Submitted by shoe on
very amusing, liked this stanza especially, "From Canada I do believe it is a dream but not her scene" and cat snuggled up in it, :~}

 

Submitted by Cavalcader on
new shoe well tried it out,make it funny wih all gloom papers.And asked for comment please and it's grammatically wrong,stanzas more than four. True cat is talkative poem "Green Eyes".Jazz.Proved study now Cat's cries denote different things say like babies. I'm trying cut length comments down,but so many Abctales Poets authors, seem like interact! with me, like kind Editor t.Cook Abctales.com Tony advice,good to do, worked stretched my brain.back on again. Like reading yours. "Vidit-chopra" done poem called !"lONELY" good only 17. As have experienced so many things good and bad, trying to help him.So drop a bit courage to him maybe.We all need.Maybe Abctales poet's might. I am interacting! cheer him up hope julie.x

Submitted by vidit.chopra on
Thank you for this Julie. Well all that loneliness seems to be gone now. I am back up and running. Thank you for the help and for cheering me up. :) As far as this poem goes well it's quite amusing. Thank you once again. :) Vidit

Submitted by Cavalcader on
new vidit.chopra Thanks glad youv'e improved and me to up about go out, whoop's hubby lost crown? no! not crowned of his tooth got go back. well I think we all need cup of cheer! Our City had market and wooden ducks sale I csn imagine them waddling across the road? Slight sleet.I have asked Abctales one or two to interact with you.Take care! Yes? your as young as you feel urr! good writer do 20 doing word's on paper images and happenings, we did and put into poem Story bing0 Julie x.

Submitted by tcook on
Julie, This is your best for a long time. I have tried to correct the punctuation and to make one or two corrections. You don't have to accept them but here is my version: I have a lovely nylon fur jacket Given to me By our wonderful daughter, free. Her friend gave it to her as a present From Canada, I do believe. It is a dream But not her scene. When I wear it about One young man called out: "I like your coat - most have Cats and dogs on." I said: "Thankyou, and in another shop Whales and wolves too." Mine is sky blue and white With penguins on all over. Black open beaks, some have fish in Others looking up for more. Even my favourite cat outside Likes to snuggle up and sit beside me to feel the warmth. It zippers up nearly to the top of my neck With long snowy white fleck sleeves. I like chocolate biscuit penguins To dunk in my tea Because of my awful teeth. A big white seagull is pecking the ground Up our path But it's never seen a jacket with penguins on. That really makes me laugh. This is try out true. I hope that helps! Cheers, Tony

Submitted by Cavalcader on
new Editor t.Cook Abctales Dear Tony, Thankyou, But for an Editor to help me Wow! Definitely master of works you are. as "Silver-spun-sand" has said "Over The Moon" for me and me.: This is purr-fect now what a difference it reads! Thankyou left coment already I wanted it to sound funny? It's worked. Thankyou for the cherry!It's not the cherry It's trying to grasp!punctuations=what they mean. Like Jennifer's kindly re-turned. i Can't grasp! I couldn't focus once,or say "The Lords' prayer. Thankyou, and particularly correcting it for me Punctuation,Capitals, question,mark and speech mark. are ok.But can't take why's and where fors? Too much explaining of puctuations.girls=girl's of dress or school, boy's boys.Big word's muddling for me! You deserve the cherry! Yes it's inspired me more plus try do better? I "asked and received" plus money back £5 more than "Hiati." One mistake it was Dolphins on other shop jacket's my mistake, and not Whales. Still got poem on twice. Sometimes not computer it's me, holding Capital block,change to right run's into small letter's.especially exclamation's that are above all numbers? Have to learn it all.Plus if I don't change glasses it's like a dance when have to use right arm, and your left leg,called co-ordination I can't do. Cheers!many thanks. Just read your "Hope in a strange corner" fab: I must cut my comment's down now I am back on interacting as you say.Thankyou I have worked out way! of IP says now,sorry. One can teel me something, till the "cow's come home" If do not get had it.=Don't=Doesn't=means etc;and other's all punctuation. I am like that in life,unfortunately. Try=play a scale, and chop sticks,not read music.But 3 Cherries. and my 1st I screamed.and 88 poems,means all the world to me. Maybe they need all,doing alter at least 30.Before 1st cherry appeared,but advanced all help.so much. Thankyou Abctales. And The Editor t.cook Tony. julie x abctales.

Submitted by MistakenMagic on
What a coincidence, Julie - this weekend I bought a new grey jumper with penguins on it! They are obviously in this season ;) Very well done on the cherry! Magic xxx

 

Submitted by Cavalcader on
new T.Cook Editor Abctales.com Dear Tony,what a surprise! thanks for your kind help in punctuation. of "P-P-P "Pick-Up-A-Penguin". and the cherry! belongs to you really. At first I put "Pick Up-A-Penguin". Not sure if stanza only four lines. Found scribbles I had a few other words I missed out. White breasted and border edges. But this is purr-fect. Well it was after your kind advice! stretched my brain. It reads great and thankyou correcting it. I just got over chill was like cat crying! Been out heavy snow-flakes. I get moods now friend has blown me a way saying over something not nice over something may do bombarded me.I miss "Borders" gone get moody. Is my interacting Authors to long as I am more like an agony aunt, and experiences help them. Thankyou so much.Just got "Hiati" cd. Cheers! julie

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Julie...I am over the moon. Tony is a great teacher, and, may I add, a hard task-master. He knows what it's all about, and this p--p--piece of yours;-) is such an achievement. Well done on the cherry, a thousand times over and speaking of penguins, I was seriously addicted to them, many moons ago. Tina;-)xx

 

Submitted by Cavalcader on
Silver-spun-sand Thankyou. julie x

Submitted by tcook on
It's my pleasure.

Submitted by Cavalcader on
t.cook Editor Abctales Tony Thankyou.Still 2 same poem on? julie Abctales.