Electronic love

Coming from a Scottish town
Where technology is a laugh
Electronic love would mean
Two toasters sharing a bath

Or maybe I've got it all wrong
Maybe it's more discreet
And when we all troop off to bed
That's when the gadgets meet

The TV and the VCR
So at odds during the day
Are suddenly snuggled up so close
Not a scart plug in their way

The corner lamp that only shines
When day has turned to night
Is laughing with the Minidisc
And boy, is its bulb bright!

And through the hallway to the left
The kitchen is ablaze
In wondrous light from the microwave
As the kettle shares its gaze

And even the little ones join in
As the electronic knife
Proposes to the chopping board
"Would you please be my wife?"

So when you wake from sleep at night
At strange sounds that you hear
Don't worry, it's not burglars
It's the fridge dishing out free beer

Then again, I could still be wrong
And the gadgets just kids stuff
Maybe it's the e-mails we both share
That's the real electronic love.