the first sign

terrifying to the eyes
of the child,
no matter the age,
is the sharp circle of
life ready to
decapitate us
when the parent,
the caregiver,
the one whose life we
depended on, the one
whose net kept us
safe,
begins to fall away---
that
first
sign
of weakness,
when this person,
this mortal,
shows themselves to
no longer be bulletproof,
by getting sick, by dropping
right then & there
in front of us,
by landing themselves in the
hospital &
this time,
coming out permanently
different,
permanently slower,
permanently more apt to
fall again &
quite possibly,
to never get up,
to cease,
to disappear forever,
leaving us holding the
reins to
nowhere.