"Fed Up?" No? Read This and You Soon Will Be!

By Denzella

Mon, 28 May 2012
  • 2842 reads
11 comments
 

Fed Up? No? Read This and You Soon Will Be!

‘I’m fed up!’
I said.
‘No, more than that…
I’m fed up,
to the back teeth
fed up!’
I said.
‘Why’s that?’
You said
‘Why not?’
I Said.

‘Whatever for?’
You said.
‘Reasons,’
I said.
‘Are you sure?’
You said.
‘It’s how I feel,’
I said.

‘I’m surprised,’
You said.
‘No, wait,
It’s gone,’
I said.

‘Gone?’
You said.
‘Yes, gone,’
I said.

‘How rude
To leave
Like that!’
I said.
‘And why
By the window
When I live on the
Seventeenth floor
Of a Tower block?’
I said.

But there was no one there to hear me…

Certificate U
Poem
Poems
Humour

Comments

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
I was far from 'fed up' when I read this, Moya. More 'tickled pink', I'd say;-) Tina

 

Submitted by Denzella on
Thanks, Tina, for the read and commenting on my piece of nonsense. I'm glad you were tickled pink! Hope you and your husband are coping? Moya
 

Submitted by ramoshf on
lol... not sure I understand what's going on here, but it was funny.

Submitted by Denzella on
Hello ramoshf, Thank you so much for reading my silly piece of nonsense and for commenting because even though it is a bit silly it's still nice to get feedback so thank you for that. I always try to read the work of people who comment on mine so I will be taking a look at yours soon. I will also let you into a little secret I don't understand what's going on with this piece either! Moya
 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on
Sometimes it's good to argue with ourselves?! Especially if one of our voices has a sense ofhumour! Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Denzella on
Hello Rhiannonw, Thank you for reading and commenting on my silly piece. Yes, Rhiannonw, but it's the other one you've got to watch! That voice is a nasty piece of work. Still, I like having a go at poetry even though I am well aware I do not possess a poetic bone in my body. I am working on one at the moment which I kid myself is written in a similar way to how Tina writes. I would just like to get one poem good enough to get cherry picked. Then I would feel I had made some progress.
 

Submitted by TVR on
Very neat, Moya darling. Made me laugh out loud, especially with the clever ending.

TVR

Submitted by Denzella on
Thanks for the read and the lovely comment. I set great store by what you say, Trev, and I am so glad it made you laugh Moya x
 

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
Great stuff, made me titter. I'll work it out later! Linda

Linda

Submitted by luigi_pagano on
Quite an original slant, Denzella. It could also be interpreted as sinister. If I may make a suggestion I would make a small addition to the sixth line of the following: ‘How rude To leave Like that!’ I said. ‘And why By the window, When I live on the Seventeenth floor Of a Tower block?’ It would make the event a bit clearer. Luigi x

 

Submitted by Denzella on
Hello Luigi, Thank you for reading and commenting on this little offering and you are quite right. I'm on to it the moment I have replied to your comment. Thank you Moya