Love?
By Denzella
- 2830 reads
The photo is nothing to do with the poem. I just like it!
Love?
I bathed in the soft pool of your love.
I swam in your sea of tranquillity.
I trembled at the touch of your lips.
I came alive with the sound of your voice.
When morning came we showered away
All traces of our night-time of love.
Being wet did not cool our ardour
As water poured from the shower above.
First locked in a loving embrace
Next thrashing about on the floor
As we succumbed to lust for each other
Before being parted once more.
With fingers we traced our faces
Making tracks in the steam on the glass
As we lovingly washed each other,
We knew this kind of love could not last.
Love such as ours is not meant to endure
The trials and tribulations of life
It carries its own seed of destruction,
Passion alone cannot make me a wife.
Would I regret one single moment
If by chance I should meet someone new?
No, there’s nothing could make me repent
The hours of love spent with you.
But now we must face separation
And I hold back the pain as we kiss
I turn away to savour the taste of you
Before tears wash you away from my lips.
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Comments
Dear Moya, we seem to
Dear Moya, we seem to coincide in our choice of topics. I have just posted a poem, Time To Say Goodbye, that is about separation which is mentioned in the last stanza of your poem, although mine is more about jealousy and suspicion than love. Your style is more traditional and very good it is too, whereas my approach is experimental. I can envision the situation you describe with neat and rhythmic verses.
Luigi
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I'm so relieved the photo has
I'm so relieved the photo has nothing to do with the poem, Moya. Very expressive of those emotions, wistful and yearning. Lovely words - I could be wrong, but if it was me, I'd lose the commas at the ends of the lines where sentences don't need to be broken. I think it might help with the flow. Please ignore if you think I'm wrong. I really like your poem - there's so much feeling in it. And I like the photo, too.
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Moya, it must be obvious that
Moya, it must be obvious that I am no expert. When I was at school, we were told that when writing a poem there should be a comma at the end of each line and a stop at the end of each stanza. Now I think to myself - if in doubt, treat it as normal sentences and punctuate accordingly - commas and stops occurring where they are needed throughout, regardless of line endings. But that might be just me.
Lincoln is gorgeous!!!
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Hi Moya. Nice picture and
Hi Moya. Nice picture and even nicer poem. A scorcher in fact, I almost came over quite unneccessary. Young passion, or love, so poignant. The last verse says it all. And don't kid us you can't write poetry!
Linda
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Hi Moya,
Hi Moya,
this was such a bewitching poem and reminded me of young love, when nothing mattered but being together and sharing those special moments.
Beautifully done.
Jenny.
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