School Letters
By echoesofgilmour
- 409 reads
Dear Ms. Antonnia Quinn,
You are a fucking loser! How the fuck did you even get your teaching license? Can you answer me that? 3 Goddamned years I have had you as a teacher and I haven’t learned a fucking thing in your piece of shit class. It’s too bad you have that immunity shit teachers get after 4 years of teaching. I can honestly say that I pray that God will come the fuck right down from Heaven and cut your head off with a fucking lightning bolt! And I hope you go right down to hell with Sadam Hussein or Osama or whoever the fuck that terrorist was who was hung or hanged or whatever! I saw the video on youtube that’s all that matters. Do you even know what a Goddamned metaphor is? You’re dumb like a faggot! There, what that a metaphor? No it wasn’t, it was a simile. But did I learn that from you? Hell no! I learned that from my old English teacher…the good one! And this fucking summer homework you gave us, who the fuck wants to do summer homework?!?!?! I sure as hell don’t! All I want to do during the summer is sleep, eat, and fantasize about banging Squirtle and Machamp while Nidorina makes me a fucking sandwich! Oh, and I also enjoy doing whatever the hell I want to do over summer, not 80 thousand hours of your dumb shit! I had plans for my senior year to be a fantastic one, but now it’s not because you’re in my life to just fuck it up! And riddle me this, why the hell is some chink bitch like you teaching ENGLISH?!?!?!?! Why don’t you go back to Hong-Kong and teach Mandarin or Chinkanese whatever the fuck language you use over there, don’t matter to me. So instead of writing that 10 page essay about how much of a winey little bitch Piggy was in Lord of the Goddamned Flies, I’m writing this letter to let you know that I deserved that fucking A in your class last year. I worked my ass off to get into Harvard or Yale or one of those. But because of you giving me a shitty B+, those faggot-ass whores in administration rejected me! I had dreams, dreams that involved being more than just a retard teacher that makes more than minimum fucking wage like you…here’s something for you to ponder too, you’ve been in this school for what? 8 years? And you still make less than all other teachers…shouldn’t that say something to you? Or do you have your head up you culo so much that you can’t fucking see it? And if you don’t know what the fuck culo means which I’m sure you don’t then look it up, it’s called the internet…and college. So go ahead and fail me, fucking fail me on this assignment. Don’t matter to me, I’ll make up the grade, I’ll get ahead of the rest of this bullshit class like I usually fucking do.
So, let me sum this the fuck right up for you….
You. Fucking. Suck.
Sincerely,
Jeremy
Dear Jeremy,
I am sorry to hear that’s what you think of me. I really had the best intentions for my classes…especially you. I knew you were smarter than the rest of the class by at least 2 standard deviations. So all I wanted to do was to challenge you…I thought that you would enjoy that. And I thought that would push you to strive to do better than you ever thought you could do. I know about the whole no child left behind thing and I can honestly tell you that I greatly dislike it and I made a vow to myself that I would strive to help my students who can get ahead of the class do get ahead. Because I do not want to end up “dumbing” you down. It just wouldn’t be morally right of me. But I saw a different Jeremy with that letter. I didn’t see that sweet innocent boy I knew to love…who I saw was a monster! You are not a good kid Jeremy, and to think I was going to risk my job for you. Yes, that’s right Jeremy, I wanted you! I dreamed of you every night. And it was your name I was thinking of whenever my boyfriend was on top of me…not him, he means nothing to me. The whole world meant nothing to me compared to what you meant to me. I would cancel my date with my boyfriend every Friday to sit outside your house and watch you organize your pokemon cards by elements…it just turned me so on! And when you ride on your pretend spaceship, I would dream that I was the spaceship, and that you would “blast off” while riding me! But you defiled me Jeremy. I put my whole heart into you and you crushed it. Crushed it into little bite sized pieces! If I could turn back time I would give you that A in the class. I would’ve gotten you into Yale. Oh God why couldn’t I have just been easy on you like the rest of the class. Why couldn’t I have listened to no child left behind. I thought I was doing good, but it only hurt me…you only hurt me. And to think I would shout your name and then lie and say it was an actor’s name. My boyfriend wouldn’t know, he doesn’t know actors at all. So I hope you’re happy Jeremy, because your wish is coming true. I will no longer be in your life. I no longer WANT to be in your life…or anybodies. By the time you get home and digest this message it will be too late. Not even Morgan Freeman’s character from “Bruce Almighty” will be able to do anything. You hurt me Jeremy, but deep inside my unconscious somewhere my heart still and always will burn for you. You will always be my one and only, my true love. So goodbye Jeremy. I’m sorry you never liked me. I’m sorry I treated you unfairly, and I’m sorry for being and awful person. I never meant it to be this way…but God has a strange way of working.
With Wasted Love,
Ms. “Q”
(the only woman that would’ve fucked you)
Dear Ms. Antonia Quinn,
I am writing because I was informed of some tragic news from one of your students. I was told that you have committed suicide. Now I do not know all the details, I do not know the exact reasoning, hell I don’t even know when you’re usually pms-ing. But I do know this: Please do not go through with it…I beg you! And the reason I am writing this is because I know you haven’t gone through with it, because you won’t. Like I just stated I don’t know the exact reasoning you would want to, but I’m willing to bet that it’s because you had a pedophile love interest with a student that mercilessly hates you. Now not only is this against the law (if you get caught) but it’s also quite sad…not the pedophile, but wanting to commit suicide because of it. Can you say “I WANT ATTENTION?” No seriously, could you? Cause that would’ve saved yourself a lot of typing, and I wouldn’t have to play this game with you with trying to figure out your messed up life and whether or not it was your dad or mom who beat you to make you the way you are. Also, don’t you think this is a bit selfish? Not for the students, from what I’ve heard they’re better off learning from someone who’s mom smoked while she was pregnant with them, but to me. If you were to actually up and kill yourself, well then obviously the school would have to at least half-ass something to honor you with, and then there’s the fact that I’ll have to find a substitute to teach while I find a permanent teacher to fill your spot. And quite frankly I do not have that kind of time as of now. I’m not going to tell you why, because I don’t need people feeling sorry for me to make life worth living. Now I know you have the advantage of being dead once you commit suicide, but I won’t…so my problems coming out of YOUR choice, I have to deal with, not you. Why don’t you take some ownership for your actions and just don’t kill yourself. It’ll just be better for everyone (except you maybe, but the reasons not to kind of outweigh those reasons to). Here, I’ll make a deal with you. I know you have an attraction to a student, and I know you’ve been stalking him. I know this and you know this…it’s on paper. Now if you were to kill yourself, do you really want to be remembered as a pedophile stalker? I sure as hell won’t! Well if you continue to live, we won’t speak of this ever again, and you can go on as you please. No 9-1-1’s will be dialed, no letters to parents will be sent home. Besides, as long as it doesn’t affect me (negatively) then I could not care less. Just one less thing for me to worry about. Besides, I never did like being a hypocrite.
Principal Mullins
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