Computer dating

Computer dating

John was feeling extremely frustrated. He was young, handsome, well off and well spoken, a decent young man in all senses of the word, but for some strange reason he had no luck with girls. Without going into the details of his failures with women, he’d finally given up trying to meet his life partner by the normal means of dancing and socializing.

He decided that a much more detailed study of any future partner was necessary, without the need to go through the process of having a row whenever a girl dumped him. To that end he tried out computer dating.

There were lots of opportunities available, but it didn’t take him very long to find out that a very large proportion of those prepared to talk to him, were a waste of effort in his terms.

But persistence pays off and one day he was in an online chat room, talking to a young lady who appeared to have everything he was looking for.

Julia had a sense of humour that paralleled his own. She loved the outdoor life, yet also appreciated the more civilised entertainments available in cities. Only one thing in this potential relationship niggled at him, she absolutely refused to send him her photograph.

Otherwise John couldn’t believe his luck. She said she was a year older than him and as a result always referred to him as ‘Johnnie boy’. She lived out in the countryside within easy reach of both the open air and London, and was every bit as interested in getting to know him, as he was to know all about her.

The mounting frustration of their on line relationship grew until at last John suggested meeting that weekend under the clock at Waterloo station. Now on any given day there must be hundreds of people waiting at this rendezvous, so Julia agreed to wear a carnation in her hair above her right ear. John said he would be carrying a copy of Gardeners World, thus showing a mutual interest in flowers so that they could pick each other out from the crowd. Then perhaps, they might go on to a restaurant, where they could sit in comparative peace and discuss their potential future together.

John was overjoyed at the prospect of meeting his perfect woman at last, although there remained a small doubt as to the reason for her persistent refusal to send him her picture.

On the agreed day John arrived at the station and hurried across to the clock. He stopped a few yards away and studied the group of people waiting, trying to pick out some young lady who could prove to be Julia. Every now and again a man or woman would go to the group and leave with their friend or partner. There was soon nobody left waiting, who met John’s vision of his perfect girl.

There was however a dumpy old lady who’d been waiting now for some time. John didn’t really like the look of her at all. She was old enough to be his mother and not very pleasant to look at either. Then she turned to face him and he saw the flower over her right ear.

This must be Julia, not at all what he’d expected. She must have lied about her age, still beauty was only skin deep so no wonder she hadn’t wanted to send him her picture. So much for internet dating!

Still, in John’s book a promise was a promise, so he took a deep breath and holding his copy of Gardner’s World prominently, went over to meet his fate.

Her face lit up as he approached. “Johnnie boy?” she queried.

John smiled bravely as he acknowledged that it was indeed him. She looked even worse close to! Badly dyed red straggly hair, with several blackened teeth showing as she smiled at him. Still a promise was binding to John and he suggested finding a restaurant as they’d agreed.

“I know just the place dearie,” she rasped. Her voice was none too pleasant either. Fortunately the place where she took him was only fifty yards away, so he didn’t have to sit with her in a taxi.

This was rapidly becoming a nightmare and John wondered how quickly he could decently make his escape. One thing was for sure, computer dating was rubbish and he’d never try it again.

They went into the restaurant and found a table. John couldn’t really think of anything to say, she was so foreign to his expectations. Fortunately she got up again almost as soon as she’d sat down.
“I’m orf to the littul gel’s room,” she rasped and left John on his own. To pass the time he looked around the rather shabby restaurant. Several couples were holding hands whilst waiting for their eggs and chips, there were one or two working men on their own and one stunning girl who was sitting two tables away from him.

He glanced shyly in her direction and to his amazement she got up from her seat and came over to him.

“Hello Johnnie boy”, she said, “I’m so pleased you passed the test!”

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