Parcel for You - Part 59

 

‘Yes,’ Spencer nodded excitedly, he was feeling relieved, vindicated, Cedric’s dodgy behaviour had been affirmed by social media ‘that’s him in the photo, that’s what he’s been wearing.’

 

‘You must have known he was sneaking out the house! Why didn’t you tell me?’

 

‘I was going to, Vanessa. I was going to tell you everything this evening! He went out yesterday as well but I kept quiet because I didn’t want to get him into trouble. I thought it might be a one off but then today he’s been so much worse, a bit of a bully to be honest and I’ve been feeling that I’ve had enough of him living here, in our house.’

 

Vanessa held onto her husband’s shoulders and looked him in the eyes. ‘You’re such a good man, Spencer, honestly, you are so kind. You know that I wanted to get rid of him as soon as he arrived but then there was his cooking and cleaning skills and…’ she sighed, ‘I don’t know, he has a certain charm and he turned my head a bit. I should have trusted my initial instinct.’

 

‘A certain charm? Spencer scratched his head, ‘He looks like he’s been pushed down an escalator!’

 

Vanessa laughed, ‘He looks like he had all his precious metals mined.’ Spencer ignored her, he looked very serious all of a sudden. ‘What? What is it?’

 

‘I’m frightened of him. I mean, how do we get rid of him? He knows where we live, he’ll just keep coming back here.’

 

‘There must be a way to..I don’t know, just crush him or dismantle him or something. It would be for the best, especially now the police might be looking for him.’

 

Their conversation was disturbed by a creaking sound on the landing, followed by a knocking on the bedroom door. Vanessa jumped and clutched her hands together.

 

‘Hello,’ Spencer called out.

 

The door opened very slowly, revealing Cedric holding a tea towel. He peered into the room very suspiciously and then walked in and perched on the bed, looking down at the bedding and proceeded to bounce up and down in his seat as if testing the mattress. ‘Nice,’ he said.

 

Vanessa coughed, her voice weak with fear. She had to remind herself that this was her home and she shouldn’t be intimidated by some damaged robot who was only there as a guest. ‘Cedric, can we help you?’

 

He placed his hands behind him, flattening his palms on top of the bedding and leant back while looking up at the ceiling. ‘I sleep here,’ he said.

 

‘No,’ said Spencer, ‘come on Cedric. Let’s go back downstairs and finish clearing up the kitchen.’ He grabbed Cedric around the waist and attempted to pull him up off the bed but he didn’t budge and was far too heavy to lift without cooperation.

 

‘Won’t he be shutting down soon,’ Vanessa whispered, checking her watch.

 

Cedric took the tea towel in his right hand and pulled it through his left before striking the bed with it, in a whipping motion causing Vanessa to gasp sharply.

 

‘In four minutes, he’ll be unconscious in four minutes. Let’s just wait it out.’

 

Cedric didn’t speak again. He lay right back on the bed, sighed a couple of times before rolling onto his side and sinking into shut-down mode.

 

Vanessa exhaled with relief, bending over slightly and leaning against the wall as if all the energy had left her body. ‘That really scared me, Spencer, he’s out of control. Please can we drive him back to the industrial estate, to the gang. Crate will take him back.’

 

‘No! I wish I’d never met him but he’s still my friend. He’s part of my tribe. We need to find a solution to this problem, one which we can live with, free from what you would call guilt. I haven’t experienced guilt, not yet but I imagine it as an ongoing, dull feeling of discomfort. We want to enjoy the rest of our lives together, don't we.’

 

‘There’s a waterfall, near where we visited in Wales, not very many people go there at this time of year, it’s very slippy..’

 

‘Vanessa!’

 

‘Well can we at least move him? This is our bed!’

 

Spencer attempted to pull him but he was a dead weight. ‘No, he’ll have to stay here. He’s an older model than me, made from heavier materials. I think he’s one of the very early models, the ones which were primarily made for..’

 

‘Made for what?’

 

‘Sexual function with the potential for development of domestic skills and sketchy speech abilities.’

 

‘Okay. I’ll sleep in Annie’s room tonight. You can sleep in here with him and we’ll both try and think of a plan to get rid of him. In the morning we can compare notes.’

 

Vanessa wondered if it would be best to take Cedric on a very long drive, to go North and just keep going and then leave him behind at a beauty spot but then there was the danger of having him in the enclosed space of her vehicle for such a long period. Dismantling him seemed like the best option, after all, he’d already been tampered with, mined. Then what to do with the bits, bury them, take them to the local dump, keep them in a box in the attic, a dirty secret?

 

She imagined how she might start with a few gentle taps with a hammer to loosen things up a little but strangely she felt the same wincing sensation that would have felt attacking a real human and she instantly recoiled from the idea. I don’t think I can do it, she thought and with a few heavy sighs, decided she didn’t want to think too much about it and began to feel sleepy.

 

In the morning she heard Cedric vacuuming the stairs again and she was about to go and speak to Spencer about any ideas he might have had but an alarming email had been sent to her from Cybermates Worldwide.

 

‘URGENT RECALL, in accordance with current government guidelines in all European countries, we have been forced to issue an urgent product recall on all Cybermates models issued prior to the last six months.’

 

Vanessa’s heart began to race. ‘So Carol was right, she whispered to herself, Carol is always bloody right.’

 

‘It is essential that you do not communicate this information with your Cybermate. Depending on the sophistication of their emotional comprehension, some models may become panicked and act in an impulsive way which puts you or others in danger.

 

There is no need to worry, your Cybermate will either be replaced free of charge at a later date (after essential updates and hardware renovations) or you will be issued with an identical model with essential safety features inbuilt. Please rest assured that all alterations will result in improved and lower risk functioning for all.

 

Please go to the Cybermates Worldwide website within the next thirty six hours and log in with the model number which corresponds with your details, you will be given a unique code which you must type into the control panel on your Cybermate. This will force a permanent shut down state and your Cybermate can be packed up and will be collected in the box provided by our courier.

 

Failure to return your Cybermate will breach the terms and conditions of your contract and, in accordance with local restrictions, may result in criminal charges.’ 

 

Vanessa gasped. It occurred to her that she might be stuck with Cedric and lose Spencer completely, or was it possible to send both of them away? The email stated that the model number needed to correspond with her own details but she had two cybermates now. Would she have to squeeze both into the box and what would be the result of doing so?

 

‘Vanessa, Vanessa, I’ve had a really good idea!’ Spencer banged on Annie’s bedroom door as he spoke with some urgency.

 

She quickly closed her email page, took a couple of deep breaths and said, ‘Come in Spencer. What is it, what’s your idea?’

 

‘Vanessa, you look all flustered!’

 

‘I’m fine.’

 

‘Your head hasn’t been turned again has it?’

 

‘No! What is it? Have you come up with a solution?’

 

‘Yes, well I was thinking about Pat and all the relationship problems she’s been having with Stu…’

 

‘Oh yes,’

 

‘Yes, are they still together?’

 

‘I’m not sure, Spencer. I haven’t been in touch with her in a while.’

 

‘I thought it would be ideal if Cedric went to live with her because she could make use of all his features. I think she could handle him.’