The Libyan dilemma (part 3)

Past the great courts, halls and all the visually stunning gardens of mount Olympus lay the slums most like all great cities upon our earth. But in our world it would be where the poor, working class and down on their luck went in Olympus it was very much the same but it was the beaten, the tired and those who just wanted to be forgotten. Past the seedy bars where nymphs and could earn extra favour with the gods, past fallen statues of heroes that time had let decay through lack of belief and neglect. Amongst these once great chiselled marble demi gods and greats alike, there still stood one which after a quick clean and a polish could most likely be placed in the gardens of Olympus.

The statue was of a man seven foot tall; head held high covered in thick curled hair that sat just past his ears. Pectoral muscles that shaded six perfectly formed abdominals, leg that looked powerful enough to run the entire earth and arms that huge you would believe they could lift it. As glorious as this statue stood you would not notice it stood proud its tall pillar, if you were to walk past this great marble your eyes would not be drawn towards the proud figure but towards the figure slumped against the base of the pillar. The figure held what was left of a jug of wine, the rest had most probably been consumed but most defiantly a fair amount must have been spilt. His chest looked like a common room carpet of a first year student stained in wine amongst other nameless things. His balding head bobbing up and down if he was trying to fight sleep and losing, the drunkard finally conceded defeat. Then releasing the grip he had on his jug, he slumped further till he lay

completely flat on the floor. He felt someone watching him rather not him but the proud figure shadowing him.

“Andsh what dud you wantsh?” the drunk said fighting to get his words out.

“What a charming way to great a brother” Hermes replied not taking his eyes off the statue.

“Owgh grats thish ish dar last think I need rights na” still fighting to get the words out, but now trying to sit up right causing him to sway like a hammock in a tropical storm

“Zeus! Can you remember when you looked like that? And I’m not here for your company your father wanted to see you Heracles” stated Hermes eyes still fixed about his brother.

“Whash that arshe wants wish me, he abandoned me ash a child ant mashe me do hish twelve labouring’s jush to gets back up hers!” Heracles tried to state once more.

“Yes” replied Hermes trying to stay calm “but never the less he has summoned……”

Hermes was interrupted “And a pony wash mans wantsh a pony I did the entire “hiccup” I did alls the …” Heracles head fell between his legs blanking out. Hermes looked down and then up trying to understand how someone once proclaimed the greatest hero on earth could turn into what was at his feet. Hermes bent down to put him on his shoulder.

“It wasn’t just a pony was it you drunken twat!” Hermes muttered struggling to lift his brother once Heracles was set upon Hermes shoulders he set off just not at his usual pace.

Another attractive nymph approached Zeus and Poseidon placing down the now unknown number jug of wine rolling her eyes as she did so. Whilst the two old deities sat grinning like fourteen year old school boys do when a French teacher picks up a pencil that has been purposefully dropped. The nymph turned, shrugged her shoulders and walked back out of the court presumably to pout another jug ready. As the wine carrying nymph left a physically drained Hermes entered carrying his brother still slumped and out cold on his shoulders dropping him in front of the wine guzzling gamblers that were gods in a breath of relief.

“well there is your hero just try and remember there are many things I can do but carrying drunk around the heavens isn’t one” Hermes said trying to catch his breath

“You should be happy to have something to do” mocked Poseidon

“Why because you’re so busy?” snapped Hermes

Heracles slowly came round groggy and confused; he picked himself up off the floor his head still rocking from side to side. Then like a tonne of bricks the realisation hit him not only of where he now was but of whom he was slumped before.

“Oh fuck what … what am I doing here and what do you want?” said Heracles his eyes straining to contend with the bright lights of Olympus.

“Nice to see you too son and I have a job for you when you sober up, that’s if you still have it in you?” Zeus said goading his son

Heracles began to drag himself up from the floor once he managed to bring himself to his feet said

“Still have it in me I am Heracles the greatest hero of all time! Who needs to be sober I beat the bloody lernean hydra with my back teeth floating in wine!” Heracles proudly stated trying to look heroic and not stagger simultaneously.

“that may be true but you took half a day to beat him, if you would’ve had the clarity to stop swinging wildly at all those heads you might of beaten him by noon” said Zeus watching Poseidon trying not to jump in the conversation.

“True but I won with no help from you true gods. Now what is it you want from me this time to fight through the underworld because you left your trident their?” Heracles said looking at Poseidon knowing full well he had I part in this somewhere.

“no nothing like my boy Antaeus is up to his old tricks and we need you to have a word with him” said Poseidon staring directly into Heracles who was summoning the nearest person carrying wine and poured himself a hefty glass, then letting the wine slide straight down his throat missing all of his taste bud as his expression did not change. Both Zeus and Poseidon looked on in amazement then in unison signalling the wine carrier to leave before he could pour himself another glass.

“Fine by me I have beaten him once there is no doubt I can beat him again”

“there is just one thing though his mother is with him might be a slight hindrance for you but I’m sure a hero like yourself needn’t worry about such things” knowing full well Heracles had too much pride to turn down any form of competition, although as of late most of his battles had been fought with wine in some unspeakable fields of war.

“Like I said its fine just give me a few days to prepare and if going after Antaeus and his mother I will need Pegasus to get down to them” asked Heracles

“I’m afraid he’s getting a bit old too old to be ridden we will arrange your transport to them we will give two days to prepare” said Zeus.

Heracles did not say anything to this he merely just nodded his head in acknowledgement turned then left the court room.

“There we go then the wager is good to go prepare to shave that beard old timer he can barely stand up and he doesn’t even have Pegasus to help him out” laughed Poseidon

“Don’t you worry about that friend he will be fighting fit in not time” Zeus replied summoning over another jug of wine

“Oh and Hermes make sure he actually does some training” added Zeus, Hermes nodded to his father and went to catch up with his brother.