Tides of Time
By Leno
- 780 reads
Journal of Andy Allen (Lou Spark)
Hello to anyone who may find this. Know that I have no idea what is going on, and that this is the only way for me to get my thoughts out and keep myself at least partially sane. To whoever may find this, know that I am not lying. Know that this is all true. And please try to understand what I'm going through as I write this down.
My name is Lou Spark. My friends call me Sparky. Don't ask me why; they just do. It's supposed to be funny, but I actually kind of like it. I hardly ever used my real name, Lou, and seldom wrote it. But we'll get back to that later, I suppose.
I am seventeen, but right now, writing this, I feel so much older. I feel as if I'm a hundred, no wait, more than a hundred. I feel as if I'm ancient. My body agrees with me, as it gives me aches and pains that I have never felt before.
I do not know what is going on; everything I know, everything I've heard or seen or felt, is written here. I hope to make sense out of this mess that has been called my life by writing it down. And, whoever may find this, please know that I was like you. Before this, I was normal. Everything has been taken from me, and as I'm sure you know, that changes people.
My name is gone now. I am no longer Lou Spark.
I am Andrew Allen.
I did not pick this name, so do not think that I hated my name or that those bullies at school got to me with their name calling. No, I liked my name. I liked my nickname. Here, in this miserable place that I am forced to live, I am known as Andy.
I have been here for what seems like ages, yet I know it has only been six months. Six months. Has it really only been that long? Six months ago I was normal; I was going to school and doing homework and hanging out with friends. I had teen problems.
I'd give anything to have those back.
I used to think being a teenager was the hardest thing in the world, but now I can see how wrong I was. I'd give anything to be a simple teenager again, going through life with a family. I wonder, sometimes, if anyone is looking for me. Surely they think I'm dead by now. I sometimes think I did die, somehow, though I'm still here. Sometimes I'm not all here; my mind wanders and travels on its own nowadays.
But we'll get back to that.
I can only write so much right now, for I have to be on the lookout. Kastin and Lee can't stay up all night; they need their sleep too. So I'm writing this on my watch, while keeping an ear out for anything out of the ordinary.
How did I get where I am now? We'll get back to that, I suppose.
I remember when I turned seventeen. That was supposed to have been a happy day, right? Wrong. It turned out to be one of the worst days of my life. It was the worst, before these past six months.
But I'll tell you all about that later.
My life has been hectic lately, and I know that I could die any day, along with Lee and Kastin. I haven't known Lee and Kastin for very long, but they're my family now, on this chaotic journey. I want nothing to do with this journey, but I am important on it, as are Kastin and Lee.
We had guards when we set off, but they've all been...
Well, I'll tell you that later.
Anyway, it's just us now, and our food supply is quickly deteriorating. We have to constantly be on the move; we can't stay anywhere more than a day, if that long. I've gotten used to the routine now, I guess. These days, everything seems like a mess. Of course, everything has felt like a mess for these past six months.
I almost can't believe any of it has happened, but I've had to live it.
Please, please, whoever may get this, please know that I was like you. That I had goals and dreams and friends and family. I went to school and had homework, and I was saving up for a car. I was like you.
I was normal, I swear I was.
Please know that I was changed. Everything was taken from me. Please know that I didn't ask for this. And I beg you, please try to understand what I'm going through, why I'm feeling this way. Please try to understand me.
Let me take you to the beginning. That sounds like a good place to start.
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It all started for me on my seventeenth birthday on May 27. The day began as normal as usual, with me stretching and yawning as I rubbed at my eyes before sitting up and cracking my back. Throwing my feet over the side of the bed, I got up and grabbed some closthes, heading out of my room and down the hallway toward the bathroom.
This was how my day usually began; with me waking up and taking a shower, and then it was downstairs to eat breakfast. I showered quickly and dressed, running my fingers through my damp mahogandy hair, my auburn eyes sparkling in the mirror as I looked at them. Smiling in satisfactory, I exited the bathroom and crept down the stairs. I turned into the kitchen and smirked as I smelled this morning's breakfast.
Bacon and eggs.
A normal food around here, but always delicious.
I sat down at the table and began eating. My father was sitting across from me, reading the morning paper. My mother was cooking more bacon. My younger brother, Trevor, was sitting on my left, digging into his food like a ravenous wolf. I smiled at him slightly, and quickly finished my food, wiping my hands and mouth with a small white napkin.
Pushing my chair back, I got to my feet and stretched. I pushed my chair in and began moving toward the door, saying, "Bye guys. I'll be back later for the party," and then I left the house.
I was to meet my friends, Kevin and John, at the park in ten minutes. Hopping on my skateboard, I rode quickly through the streets, dodging people and cars.
I was still a few blocks from the park when I heard a rushing sound go by me, though no one was there. Frowning, I continued on my way, knowing that Kevin and John didn't like to be kept waiting.
Soon enough, I arrived at the park, where I skidded to a halt in the slippery grass. It had rained yesterday, and the grass was still slightly damp. Sighing, I looked around, looking for my two friends.
I heard something-kind of like a breathing sound- in my left ear, and spun quickly, immediately going down into a defensive position. But no one was there. I shook my head. 'Calm down, Sparky,' I thought to myself as I went back to looking for the familar faces of my friends.
I spotted them as they came skating toward me, riding on the sidewalk. I smiled and waved as I jogged toward them, skateboard in hand. They stopped in front of me and smiled.
"Hey Sparky," said John, his voice-like always- hyper and active. Kevin shook his head, eyes eyes hyper as well. The two were close friends, and had known each other for years. Luckily, when we had moved to this town six years ago, I had been accepted into their group. I was now one of them. "What's up, my main man?" he lifted his hand for a high five, and I gladly gave it to him.
"Nothing much," I responded with an easy shrug of my shoulders. "You?"
"Fine. So the birthday boy has nothing planned for today?" Kevin drawled. "What a surprise." I rolled my eyes at him, and he laughed and enveloped me in a headlock. Laughing, I struggled to get away, but I wasn't really trying all that hard. Laughing, he released me and then handed me a neatly wrapped gift. I blinked at it for a moment, and he said, "Happy birthday, Sparky."
"Thanks," I said. "But you really didn't have to-"
"I know," he broke in. "I wanted to." I shrugged and took the gift, where I then proceeded to open it. Inside was a small white box. Smiling to myself, I opened it and then gasped at what was inside.
Inside was a silver chain necklace with my nickname, Sparky, written on it. Too shocked to speak, I could only stare. Kevin clapped me on the back, chuckling, and John laughed. "What's the matter?" he asked. "Cat got your tongue?"
Kevin laughed too. "C'mon man, don't get all emotional on me."
I shook my head and scowled at the two of them. "Oh shut up," I said, and then quickly put the necklace on. "Thanks Kev," I said. "This must have cost a fortune. You really didn't have to."
"I know," he said, shrugging again as if it were no big deal. "But I wanted to. It's not every day you turn seventeen, you know. You're now officially older than us. Old man," he said, and chuckled. I rolled my eyes and found myself scowling once more at their antics. They made me laugh; they were good friends. Kevin looked at John, and then John smiled and held out a small box.
"Sorry it's not wrapped," he said, "but I'm not good at wrapping gifts. Ask my mom. She makes me leave when we do the wrapping for Christmas." I smirked and grabbed the box, where I began to open it. Inside was a small book. I smiled and took it out of the box. It was the book I had been wanting for weeks now.
"Thanks John," I said. "How'd ya know?"
He smiled. "Well, I guess I'm just that much of an awesome friend to know what you want. By the way, thanks for telling me that you wanted that book for your birthday," he said, and then gave a little cough at the end. I laughed and rolled my eyes, smirking once more. "Anywho, enjoy it. It's supposed to be good."
"I know," I said. "I looked stuff up about it on the web." The web was what we called the Internet. We had called it that since we had met six years ago, and we still called it that today. "Dean Koontz gave it a good review."
John nodded. "Yup, I heard about that." his tone of voice made me know that he didn't really care one way or the other, and that he hadn't heard about it. Sighing, I shook my head and put the book back in the box, closing it.
"Thanks guys," I said. "Seriously. You didn't-"
"I know, I know," sighed Kevin, shaking his head. "We didn't have to. We know already. But we did. What? Are you going to take the gifts back because we got them for you?"
I shook my head. "You know, Kev, you can be an ass at times."
He smirked. "It's my job, Sparky. It's my job."
"How much does it pay?" John asked. "Because I could use some spare cash and I can really be an ass, or so my mom says when she's mad at me. 'Sides that, she's always pestering me to get a job and stop hounding her for money."
I laughed, I couldn't help it. These two were just so crazy at times... Kevin smirked as he said, "Oh, it pays good money. How do you think I paid for Sparky's gift?"
John laughed. "But of course. So the pay is good...hmm, what about the hours? How long must I be an ass?"
"Oh, it's permanent. You must be an ass for life."
"Oh, well then I'm good," said John, smiling. "Because I'm always an ass." He said it with a completely straight face, and I found myself laughing once more.
"Okay, okay," I said. "Enough."
They laughed and grinned at me. I shook my head and smiled.
Suddenly, I heard the noise once more, a breathing in my ear. I froze, my smile freezing on my lips as I held my breath. The feeling of being watched came along with the sound as it happened again. I spun around, looking for the source of the noise, but there was no one there. Was I just hearing things? I wasn't sure.
"Dude, what is it?" John asked.
"You okay, Sparky?" Kevin asked me as their grins disappeared.
I shook my head and nodded, smiling once more. "Yeah," I answered. "Yeah I'm fine."
They shared worried looks but nodded just the same. "Shall we then?" Kevin asked as he got back on his skateboard. John followed suit.
I nodded my head and jumped onto my skateboard as I took off.
I was so into my thoughts that I didn't hear them calling out my name...
...not until it was too late.
A horn blared, and people shouted.
Before I knew what was going on, there was pain. An immense fiery pain in my side as I was hit and sent flying through the air. I hit the ground hard, or at least I thought I did. Maybe the guy caught me, I don't know. But when I managed to open my eyes, there was a guy standing over me. Wincing, I breathed painfully.
"Lou Spark?" he questioned in a monotonous voice. All I could do was stare. Smirking, he took his foot to my head, and everything went blank.
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_____
I awoke sometime later.
I hadn't the slightest idea where I was, only that my head was killing me, and my wrists were tightly bound behind my back as I lay on the ground, on my stomach. Groaning, I closed my eyes and swallowed. I tasted blood, and I coughed, making a disgusted sound.
I didn't know what was going on, or what had happened. But as it all started coming back to me, I began to panic.
What was going on? I struggled to break free, but the binds held tight, and I found my eyes filling with tears of frustration. 'C'mon,' I thought to myself. 'C'mon, break already!' For what seemed like ages, I struggled, pulling at my bands, desperately trying to free my wrists.
But my effort was wasted; the ropes-chains, whatever they were-weren't budging. Sighing in defeat, I stopped struggling and managed to sit up. Looking around, I frowned.
I was in a small, windowless room, and it was dark. The floor was cold and damp, and the room had a certain stench to it. Please do not ask me to tell you more than that, because I do not wish to remember it. I will only say that it was rank smelling, and that I could not see very well.
My vision was blurred for a moment, and I struggled to clear my eyes by blinking. As my eyes adjusted to the dark room, I noticed a door off to my left. A smudge of light came through from under it, but that was it, and it wasn't near enough to lighten the room.
Sighing, I hung my head low. 'Where am I?' I thought to myself, my heart thumping loudly in my chest. 'What's going on?' I frowned, thinking back to the moment I had blacked out.
"He knocked me out," I whispered to myself, my eyes tightly closed. "He did it on purpose; he knocked me out. But why?" I groaned then; thinking too much just made my already aching head hurt all the more. "What...What's going on?" I chanced a glance around the room, but saw no way out, nor anything to cut my ropes-if they were ropes-with. I blinked back my tears, taking a deep breath. 'Okay,' I thought to myself. 'Stay calm, Sparky, stay calm. You're okay.'
It was then that the door opened, and my eyes darted toward it to see what was going on. A man entered, but the shadows of the room shielded his face from me. Somehow, I knew he was smirking as he said, "Hello, Lou Spark. I hope your stay so far has been...refreshing."
I glowered at him, seething inside. Taking a breath, I said, "What the hell? Where am I?" I pulled at the ropes once more, suddenly feeling uneasy. "What's going on? Why am I here?"
The male chuckled and bent down in front of me. The shadows continued to cover his face from view, though I glared at where I thought his eyes should be. "So many questions for one so young," he said smoothly, his voice calm, if not slightly amused. "But sadly, I cannot answer any of them." with that, he slapped me, hard, across the face.
My head whipped to the side, I just sat there, my eyes wide, my left cheek stinging. I looked at him once more, taking shaky breaths.
"What the hell was that for?" I all but shouted. "What is your problem, dude?"
This time, he punched me hard in the left cheek. I whimpered and was knocked sideways, where I lay there, shocked. Breathing heavily, I looked up at him.
Growling, he said, "You do not talk to me that way, boy." his voice, though calmer than I would have expected, was completely serious. "Do so again, and it may be the last thing you ever do. You are no longer in charge, Sparky." He said my nickname in a venomous tone of voice, and I flinched involuntarily. Grabbing the front of my shirt, he pulled me toward him, where he glared into my eyes. His eyes, a light green, were dangerously narrowed, and seemed as if they were searching my very soul.
Shuddering, I struggled once more. He slammed me hard into the ground, where I rested upon my back, staring at him in fear. "You do not resist," he snarled, his voice no longer calm. "You do not struggle, do you understand me?"
When I didn't answer, he threw another harsh punch at my right cheek. Flinching, my eyes closing tightly as they filled with tears, I felt my heart speed up.
"I asked you a question, boy! Answer it, if you value your life."
Breathing quickly, I said, "Y-Yes, I understand." my voice was soft and sounded strange to my own ears. "I understand," I said again.
"Good," he said. "You will wait here until I decide to come back and...start in on you," as he said this, I knew he was smirking. He rose to his feet as I lay there on my back. "And Sparky," he said as he stopped at the door. I frowned and looked at him, not sure what to expect.
"Y-Yes?" I whispered, and mentally cursed myself for sounding so scared, so vulnerable.
"From now on," he said, his voice calm once more. "You will no longer be known as Lou Spark." he paused for a moment, and then shook his head.
I frowned, my head spinning. "Then...what will I be known as?" I was confused.
Please understand that this is a part that is hard for me to write, because this is where I lost everything. To lose your name makes you lose a part of yourself.
"Why can't I be known as Lou Spark anymore? That's my name."
He chuckled, and I found myself shivering as he did so. "No," he said. "That is no longer your name. Lou Spark doesn't exist anymore."
"Then...?" I murmured, looking away. "What...What is my name?"
"From now on," he said as he opened the door and began to go out. "you will be known as Andrew Allen." he exited the room and shut the door behind him, leaving me in darkness.
Frowning, I could only lie there. Andrew Allen. I closed my eyes. Andrew Allen. I was no longer Lou Spark. I didn't know what to think.
"Andrew Allen," I mumbled to myself, and took in a small breath as I sat up.
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That's how I became Andy Allen.
The life that I had known was gone by then, even if I hadn't been sure how much at the time. Looking back, it all seems to go by in a blur. Waking up in that cold, dank room had been terrible. I still shiver as I remember it.
I was sitting in the corner, my hands still tightly bound behind my back, when he had come back into the room. He had found me there, in the corner, and had literally dragged me to my feet and out of the room by the front of my shirt.
First, I had been taken to a restroom, where I had been allowed to relieve myself. After holding it for so long, it felt like such a relief.
After that, I was taken to small room, where ceiling lights glowed made my mood perk up some. After being in the dark for so long, it felt good to be in the light.
I was knocked roughly to the ground, where I lay there on my stomach for a moment, before I huffed out a breath and rose to my knees. "What was that for?" I asked, my eyes ablaze. I was getting sick of all of these random hits.
For my answer, I was clipped hard in the back of the head. I whimpered and went back down on my stomach, where I lay there for a while, stunned. Wincing, I rolled over onto my back, where I stared up at the white ceiling, seemingly in a daze. I was kicked roughly in the side, and before I knew it I was curling into a tight ball, curling at the waist.
"The hell?" I coughed out. "What was that for?" Groaning, I could only lie there. My ribs were already sore, and he was just making it worse.
"Get up, Andrew," he snarled, and kicked me again, this time in the head.
My head was whipped to the side, and I coughed and groaned at the same time, if that were possible.
"I thought you were stronger than this, boy," he kicked at me again, landing it in my left shoulder. I hissed in pain and felt the tears fill my eyes. What the hell was wrong with this guy? "Andy, get up."
Andy? Must have been some new nickname, I realized with another hiss of pain as he raised his foot and stomped down on my injured shoulder.
"Stop..." I managed to whisper. "Please..." I hated sounding so weak, but I couldn't help it. I may have been athletic, but I had never been beaten. This was new to me, and I didn't like it one bit. He kicked me again, harder, in the side. I gasped and croaked out, "P-Please...stop..."
He laughed and bent down next to my head. Taking his hand, he gently stroked my cheek. It was uncomfortable, and I flinched, my eyes closing tightly once more. "I'm sorry, Andy," he said quietly, his voice gentle and calm. "I don't like having to hurt you like this. But you leave me no choice. Now, are you going to get up and do what I say, or are you going to continue disobeying me?" his voice made it clear that he was calling the shots. "Are you?"
"Y-Yes..." I squeaked, my eyes tightly closed, my heart racing around in my chest as it searched for a way out. "I will..." Struggling, I managed to get to my feet, ignoring my throbbing head and my aching ribs.
He got to his feet as well, and with his hand on my back he led me forward. I felt twitchy, unsure of what was going on or what was about to happen. He led me down a narrow hallway and into a small room, where a bunch of small shelves were.
Frowning, I stopped when he took his hand off of my back. He went over to one of the shelves and pulled out a black shirt and a pair of gray pants. With it was also a gray muscle shirt and khaki shorts. There were also a pair of khaki pants and a green shirt. He looked me up and down for a moment, and then nodded his head, seemingly deciding on a size.
"Take your clothes off," he demanded, and went back to searching through the shelves. I blinked at him for a moment, my eyes confused.
"Um...what?" I questioned, unsure of whether or not I had heard him right.
"Take your clothes off," he said again, looking at me with narrowed eyes. "Do it. Now. You need to change."
"Um...I...can't," I struggled with the binds, and he smirked as he came toward me. I flinched involuntarily, unsure of what he was going to do.
"Sorry, I forgot about those," he said, and moved behind me to untie me. Free at last, I moved my arms, popping my shoulders, and then I went to work on rubbing my wrists. They were red from my struggling. "Now, get your clothes off and change into these," he said as he tossed a tan muscle shirt at me and a pair of khaki pants.
I caught them and stared at them for a moment, and then proceeded to stripping out of my clothes, ignoring the fact that there was another male in the room with me. Once I was changed, he handed me a backpack. I gripped it awkwardly, gazing at it, not sure what was in it.
"Oh," he said and then showed me a silver necklace.
"That's mine!" I said, and made a grab for it. He grabbed my arm and twisted it, and then kneed me in the gut, knocking me to the floor. I groaned and lay there, dazed and shocked. "That's mine..." I whispered. "Give it back..."
In response, he placed his foot on my back and began pressing down, adding more weight with ever second. I gasped and struggled to move, but he stomped down harder and then kicked me in the side as he moved his foot away.
"It is not yours, Andrew," he said. "Your name is not Sparky. It is Andrew Allen." He tossed the necklace into a waste basket in the corner of the room. I watched it, wide eyed. "You no longer need it."
"But...But...my friend gave me that!" I said, and struggled to get to my feet. You'd think I'd learn not to struggle, but I guess I was slow.
He bent down next to me and slapped me across the face. When that didn't stop me, he grabbed the hair at the back of my head and pulled back, pulling my head up and back as well. I froze, breathing quickily. I swallowed thickly, unsure of what he was going to do.
"I do not care who gave it to you, Andrew. Do not make me kill you; it would be unpleasant for both of us." with that, he released me and allowed me to rise to my feet. "You do not need the necklace."
Then, suddenly, he slammed me against the wall and turned me so I facing it. Gasping, I struggled to move away. He hit me hard in the head, and it went forward and connected to the wall. Groaning, I stopped resisting.
He pulled my hands behind my back, and I began to panic. He was going to tie me up again! He hit me in the back of the head again as I began to struggle, and then twisted my right wrist when that didn't work. I stopped struggling immediately, and he crossed my wrists over each other. Closing my eyes, I could only shake my head. The ropes were tied tightly, and began to cut into my wrists.
Wincing, I was shoved forward and out of the room as he picked the backpack up off of the floor, his hand on my back.
"Why are you doing this?" I whispered, tears gleaming in my eyes. "Why me?"
For a moment I thought he was going to hit me again. I flinched when his hand moved on my back, and he chuckled. "You're flinchy," he commented, and then he paused. "I am doing this because I have to. We chose you because...well, I'm not at liberty to say. There is only so much I can tell you, Andy. I am sorry for the confusing."
I frowned to myself. At times, he seemed nice and it seemed like he cared about me, cared about what happened to me. But then again, at times he was rude and liked to beat me. I was confused by him.
"Do not ask too many questions, Andy. If you ask them to the wrong people, I will not be able to protect you. The Law forbids you to ask questions; legally, I'm supposed to kill you right now."
I flinched and held my breath, my heart skipping a beat as I tripped over my feet in my walking. I managed to catch myself, though, and heard him laugh.
"I won't kill you, Andrew. But be careful what kind of questions you ask, and who you ask them to."
"...Why...are you helping me?" I asked softly, my voice a mere whisper.
"Because," was his answer. "No more questions, punk," he said, and hit the back of my head. I winced and looked around. Four other guys were watching us, and I began to panic inside. One was bad enough; but five? I couldn't deal with it right then. "Andrew Allen," he said. "Do you have to use the restroom before we return to your room?"
I paused. "No," I murmured, my head hanging low. As we came to the stairs that led down to my holding cell, I stopped. "What about food?" I asked. "And water? Don't I get any?"
He growned and shoved me down the stairs. At the bottom, he opened the door and shoved me in. I tripped and stumbled, landing on my knees. Unable to catch myself, I fell forward onto my stomach. Scowling, I sighed.
"No more questions," he said. "You get food and water when we decide to give it to you. You are a dog; you have to earn everything." With that, he shut the door behind him, leaving me alone in the darkness.
"Dog?" I murmured as I got to my knees, testing my binds once more. They were tight; tighter than they had been, and they were cutting into my wrists.
I sighed heavily then, and found the tears filling my eyes once more. Swallowing, my throat was dry. I glared at the ground with my misty vision, and felt a tear trail down my bruised cheek. What was going on, where was I? So many questions, so few answers.
"What have I gotten myself into?" I questioned aloud, knowing that no one would answer.
Things were beginning to seem hopeless.
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