flush

to tell you would be stupid
a useless act
when i think i already know
you don't feel the same
don't even like me
couldn't make you if i tried
besides you already know
not from my mouth maybe
but still,knowing is knowing
i feel my cheeks flush
if you notice my stare
wonder what your thinking
as you stand watching me from there
maybe you don't think its true
or,perhaps you just don't care
you feel uncomfortable around me
you know what i feel beneath my hair...
i'm trying to stop,really i am
but what it comes down to is...
i'm not sure that i can
i know theres no point
but can't seem to let go
and,if i'm going to feel this...
shouldn't i just let it show?
but without saying the words,
or,writing them down
what other way is there
of letting you know?
let me go back to the why
not the how...
whats the use of expressing
what can only lead to the opposite of joy?
broken heart,tears..
rejection
but it shouldn't feel that bad...
after all,i wasn't expecting affection
i'm thinking too much
not reaching any conclusion,
no hope of changing your feelings
i'm under no illusion
i'll just have to stop.
return to undecided confusion