A Devil's Plea?

I wanted to be just like you Lord
benevolent loving and kind.
I wanted to make things better -
to improve the lot of mankind.

I wanted to show them my beauty -
the brilliance of my mind.
Arrogance made me a rebel -
conceit made me wilful and blind.

Man seemed delightfully different...
A change from the bland and the trite.
Passionate, amusing, carefree and fun -
irreverent, yet funny and bright.

Mistaking their zeal for commitment,
confusing their passion with might,
I turned away from your brilliant day
and into the black of the night.

I mixed with the blind and the blinkered -
seeking to improve their sight.
I envied the way that they did what they liked -
regardless of duty or right.
I learned their conventions and fashions -
learned how to quarrel and fight.
I learned how to drink, learned how to lie,
turning away from the light.

I deemed them my friends and my comrades
no finer companions than they.
I was eager to assist, be of service -
to help in some positive way.
They were my friends and my allies -
in need of a fool who could pay.
So it was that stupefied sucker -
turned into somnolent prey.

I did all the things that they asked me -
just to look good in their eyes.
I bartered my honour for favours,
squandered my love chasing lies.
I exchanged all my hopes for illusions
and traded my laughter for sighs
I flirted with perversion and evil
became all the things you despise.

Tempted by childish dreams of glory;
lured by promises of power:
Seduced by sweet songs of sentiment;
embittered by the bile of the sour.
Hoodwinked by the hucksters of happiness,
who posed as purveyors of joy.
Wounded by sirens who sang to my soul
and yet treated my heart like a toy.

Exploited by the greedy and selfish:
just another means to an end.
Slandered by the jealous and hopeless,
betrayed by brother and friend.
Denounced by the pundits of opinion,
and bludgeoned by the bullies of blame.
Tormented by terror and conscience,
yet silenced by secrets and shame.

They brag of their skills and their knowledge
claiming Thy work as their own.
Authors of fiction posing as seers of truth -
pretending to know the unknown.
Hiding their guilt behind a facade of deceit -
opinion masquerading as fact.
Broadcasting their lies, promoting their illusions,
making promises they always retract!

Lord, please let me come home now!
I am weary, empty, alone.
I have struggled to help and to guide them
hoping somehow to atone.
O Lord, they are wilful and stupid,
frivolous, greedy, unkind.
They lie to themselves and each other
pretend to be caring and kind.

O Lord, you know how I've suffered -
for my arrogance, hubris and pride.
I recant, I repent, I regret, and request
that you let me return to your side.

O Lord, please let me come home now,
to praise all the great works you do.
Let me dwell once again in the warmth of Thy heart
and prove, at last, to be true.