D'You Think That Captain Birdseye Is a Wanker&;#063;

D'you think that Captain Birdseye is a wanker?
D'you think he sits there stroking all day long?
D'you think the little fishes
Given four and twenty wishes
Would request a brief cessation from his schlong?
D'you think he's tried Rohipnol on the penguins?
D'you think he's tried to shag a polar bear?
D'you think the ravaged tuna
Given time and opportuna
Would remove and dice his wang without a care?
D'you think that Captain Birdseye humps his shipmates?
D'you think he takes the Night-Watch up the bum?
D'you think the Able-Seamen
When they're getting sick of semen
Dream of slitting him from gizzard down to tum?
I think that Captain Birdseye's just a pervert
And I'll tell you why in plain and simple prose:
It's the smell that always lingers
Right around his fishy-fingers
And the kids that run around him as he goes!