Peter Macavity Rabbit

cf http://allpoetry.com/Macavity:-The-Mystery-Cat

This Peter was a hasty bunny, thought himself invisible,
his confidence was immature and dangerous and risible,
but oft as not when old Mac came from tea to view his cabbages,
there was no sign of Peter but a scene of nibbling ravages!

He knew it must be Peter, of course it must be Peter
– but Peter wasn’t there!

One day he’d catch him, yes he would, he’d catch that stealing thief,
and Peter would be careless, and be caught and come to grief.
Mac hid behind his newspaper, and settled down to to watch,
surely this time now he would  be spry and pounce in time and catch;

he fell asleep, and when he woke, saw tell-tale signs of eating,
but Peter wasn’t there – it must have been that Peter,
of course it must be Peter –
this scene just kept repeating,    
but always, Peter wasn’t there!

There came a day, when Peter lolled, well fed amongst the leafage,
and old Mac spied the careless bunny, frowned at all the damage,
he tiptoed out to get his net, though stumbling with his bunions,
he reached his shed, unhooked it where it hung amongst the onions,
he tiptoed back, but Peter woke and saw the stalker busy
he tore around, and round and round – old Mac got dazed and dizzy,

then Peter shot out through a hole,
so, then he wasn’t there –
Mac said, ‘It was that Peter, I’d got that Peter,
he’s gone again to there from here!’

Soon Old Mac put a fence up, a strong and rabbit-proof fence,
It cost a lot of money, but it really did make sense,
not only to protect his veg, but also spare his health
– his irritation rose as grew this Peter’s skill at stealth;

so now he potters happily, his veg know no attack,
for Peter isn’t there, no Peter isn’t there, he won’t come back
he’s far away,  he’ll steal a meal today for sure
from someone else’s nurtured store
but not from old Mac’s garden anymore!

with apologies to T S Eliot and Beatrix Potter!

[IP: Take an existing myth or poem and repurpose it to provide a new, refreshing and original take.]