CC 97: After The Flop

When was the last time I woke up in a pile at the side of the road?  I don’t think I’d ever slept rough in all my years.  Oh, wait.  Yes, I had.  One night, in Dublin, many years before, I’d been visiting Emer during her time there as a student, and stupidly allowed myself to linger in the city late.  I was supposed to go back to Dundalk that evening after she returned to her flat, but instead I went for more drinks on Dorset Street with some pubgoblins I’d met, and found myself wandering in the night with nowhere to sleep.  I didn’t want her to know that I’d stayed out drinking, and ended up finding a quiet area along the canal in the early hours and crawled up and slept for a while.  It’s a miracle no junkies or creeps stumbled upon me.  What a silly thing to do that was. 

‘Come on, get up, you muppet,’ she said, helping me to my feet.  Emer had sprung from nowhere like an empyreal wood nymph to rescue me from my flop in the wilderness.  I must have fallen as the dog gave chase, and just lay there in the leaves and nettles.  Whatever had happened with that beast, it seemed to be gone now.  Had I imagined it?  Nah, something I knew to be real in this town were the dogs and their tendency to run after you.  Anyway, however long I’d been out for the count, there appeared to have been a return to my senses.  Head wasn’t as fuzzy anymore.

‘Did you leave the party?’ I asked.

‘I came to help get you home,’ Emer said.  ‘Found you lying out here unconscious, ya stupid get.’ 

‘What time is it?’

‘Doesn’t matter.  You have to get back and put your head down.  On a soft pillow, not one made of soil and foliage.  Remember : you have an interview later today.’

‘What?’

‘For the Santa gig.’

‘Oh.  Right.’

I forgot about Santa.

‘So you just ran out on them all?  What about Paidi?  What’d he have to say about that?’

‘It’s nothing.  Sure I’ll be going back.  Just realised somebody should give you a hand.  You’re in no state to do anything.  The good fortune of attending to your calamity fell to me.’

I loved the way she spoke.  She said words like they were perfectly constructed pieces of music.   They just came to her and she played them like songs from heaven.  I might have been one of her students, lapping up the splendour of her language, and learning all about beauty and symmetry in the world.

‘Well, I’m glad you came,’ I said.  ‘I was a complete bastard in there.  I’m sorry.’

‘You don’t need to say anything about it, Pascal.  We were all out of our minds for a moment, so no point labouring on the effects.  It’s in the past.  I’m not bothered.  I mean, did you see me in there?  I was a zombie for a long time.  I don’t know what happened.  But now I’m feeling better.’

It was true.  She was herself again. 

‘Come on,’ she said.  ‘Let’s walk down to the main road and try to find you a taxi.’

We were getting near dawn as I could hear a few precocious birdies fluttering through the trees above us.  The sky was still dark with the night, but cloudless, and when we looked up, we could see we were under a dazzling truss of stars.  As we walked, I decided to come clean:

‘Emer, I have to tell you something.’

‘What?’

‘That interview.  For the Santa job.  It was bullshit.’

‘I knew it.  I bloody knew it.  Why did you lie?’

‘I was embarrassed.  I didn’t want you to think I wasn’t looking for a job.   Like nothing had changed for me.’

‘Ya header.  I’d be angry if it wasn’t for the fact that you put a funny image in my head.  You as Santa.  Fantastic.  I forgive you, Santa.’

‘Thanks.’

‘So you’re not looking for a job?’

‘I am, well, I’ve been at the rear of things for a while.  But I can feel a new wind in me.  Like I’m ready to end the slump, and pick myself up.’

‘Well, I had to pick you up just then, so I hope you’ll be able to manage it yourself when I’m not there.’

‘I’ll manage it.’

 I was in the woods with the woodland mother again.  Her tawny helmet gleamed as the tiring street lamps cast their last lights on us with all their remaining strength.  Emer’s hair shone brilliantly back at them with a blonde luster, a new glow to bolster the old mellowing one.