I Saw Me

Cherry

By smokejack

Wed, 07 Dec 2011
  • 1322 reads
7 comments
 

I Saw Me

I saw me on the other side of the river
I saw me in a car that just drove by
I saw me in a job that eats you inside
But I never once heard me asking why

I saw me bored in a supermarket aisle
I saw me buying things I don’t need
I saw me storing things I’ll never use
But I never asked who fed my greed

Until now
Until now
When I caught the scent
Of a sacrificial cow

I saw me standing in a queue
I saw you were doing the same
I saw the time was laughing at me
This is a picture in a broken frame

I saw me underneath a naked tree
I saw me tired like a pale yellow light
I saw the meaning of life today
And it wasn’t such a beautiful sight

Until now
Until now
When I realised I didn’t have to apologise
crawl or bow

©JmN 2011

Certificate U
Autobiography

Comments

Submitted by seashore on
I really like this smokejack - but did you mean `curtsey' in the last line?

Submitted by smokejack on
Hi Seashore thanks for comment and spotting typo too! I've change the word as it meant the same as bow. Appreciate you taking time out to read this. Cheers

Submitted by seashore on
Yes much better with `crawl or bow'.... and definitely deserving of the cherry!

Submitted by sandspirit on
I enjoyed this, the idea that I can watch myself, and have opinions and feelings about what I see. So who or what is this "I"? Very nicely captured.

Submitted by Highhat on
Somehow or every which way I found this beautiful. A lot of afterthought. I think it was very powerful and melodic. Hmm thanks for a brilliant read. ;)Pia

Submitted by catherine poarch on
i like this too, especially the short, simple lines, repetiveness...can't spell that!...and then change of rhythm. i found five minutes at work for a quick look at someone elses' poems and this was worth it. catherine

 

Submitted by smokejack on