Drowning
By socialeaf
- 1303 reads
I've told you before
I remember nearly drowning once
- made small by swells
that had seemed tame from the sand
just moments before.
Screaming for someone,
my voice stolen by marbled effervescence
and vastness- shoulders surrendering.
That time the rip took me back in.
I was lucky.
This place is a sea too you know.
Don't forget its depth.
Its basalty bed rests in cold darkness
fathoms below the streets, the lights
and our ever-treading soles.
Waves sweep through windows
and the rip swipes your feet from
the surest of floors
- a phantom peril.
You called out, didn't you?
As loudly as you could have,
and yet almost imperceptibly
-many decibels below
the noise, the talk and the metal tides.
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Comments
I loved the lightness of the
I loved the lightness of the conversational tone, which worked so well against the depth of the subject. The use of the frightening experience - not being heard - the knowledge that we are just as much at sea on dry land when we call as loudly as we can, but still no one hears, comes together in a feeling of underlying threat. I had that exact same experience at the age of ten.
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You have such an overview
You have such an overview here and it's so well expressed. I love the sweeps from the swells of the ocean to the slap of feet on concrete.
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