My Childhood Sword

Alas my childhood sword, a dagger to me now. How big it seemed at the time, how big it was. Looking back, I finally see how easy living was back then; the time has gone so quickly. And what have I done? I’ve been dead for years now, sleeping. I won’t let any more go by. To fear something to stop me living when it has been so long since I breathed the air; since I lay in the grass and gazed at the clouds whisper past. Life within my own mind for so many years. Torture. Love. True laughter. Long gone from this place I walk.
My childhood sword lies so innocently in my hand. Clean of all who fell at its bravery, not mine. I rest the blade in my hands and I smile. My baby. Take a deep breath. Close your eyes. I grip the blade - a little tighter. Still smiling. My child. A little tighter - tighter still. The blade is so warm, and I am so cold.
Look around, my love, it is just the two of us. Safely away from the world. In a dream; timeless domain. Open your eyes now. I can’t see. There are clouds in my eyes, raining, falling away. Where are we now? It is only the two of us. Keep smiling. Let me go now.
My hands; so warm - but I still feel cold. Back where we started. My childhood sword still shines, so innocently. An insult to my dirty skin. How long since I swam in pure waters; how long since the world around me shimmered? True beauty, lies in front of me. This blade. My friend. I’m so sorry I left you behind. How did you find me? I buried you in consecration; you’d always be perfect, too perfect to stay with me. My skin is no longer white. My eyes are not so naïve that I thought I should have left now. But what if I had stayed? I still would have grown older, colder.
You remain so clean, so perfect as if you’d never touched an evil soul. God bless you. You light the faintest of paths down my arm so perfectly. Kiss me. Your red mark drips down my mouth, down my neck, beneath my clothes. So warm. I’m still cold. Give me strength. Smother me. Will you lie with me in the grass? Spend a life to ourselves. Be with me.
Let me hold you close to my heart. A little tighter. I’ll hold you in my arms. Kiss them. Make me warm. Let’s go home. I’ll never leave you again.