Empty Sphere

Cherry

By threeleafshamrock

Sun, 19 Jul 2009
  • 3494 reads
17 comments
 

Oh empty sphere
You linger here
though clouded in thick fog
and you possess
the deft finesse
of an arthritic frog

It seems that you
could misconstrue
The Lords’ Prayer if you tried.
Imagined slights
are your delights,
though sorely wound your pride.

I’d chance to say,
you start your day
with bouts of flagellation
you might find peace
and more release
if you tried masturbation

You rant and rave
and try to save
the world with bitter rancor.
Your constant spate
and need to bait
suggests, a rare sperm-banker

You spew advice
and criticise
like a lecturer in college;
professing care
you proud, declare
your fearless lack of knowledge.

You target those
who praise your prose,
with smiles and offer kudos.
And then, just when
they bare their skin
you scourge with scentless thorn rose

It makes me sick
that you should lick
your lips and take such pleasure,
or cock your snout
to proudly spout;
you're such a fucking treasure!

What goes around
is surely bound
to come back; not to extol
but justice serve
and with real verve,
chew lumps out of your arse hole

Self righteous ass,
raise up your glass
and drink to your achievement
I’ll wait ‘the day
That you dismay;
Your literary bereavement!

Certificate 18
Humorous Ramblings
Humour

Comments

Submitted by sarah wilson on
:)

Submitted by Jupiter on
Woof! Woof! Ha! Ha! No imagined slights in this one! Can't imagine what you must have read to inspire this little rant. You know, someone who cared about your opinion might get upset at this and feel bullied - but I suppose that is the intention. Nice colours! Of course the danger with this type of work is that it often says more about the writer than the subject. Ha! Ha! Well - at least someone is playing along with this weeks IP, although I had hoped for more thought and less vitriol. PS. you need "you're" instead of 'your' to mean 'you are' in the line you're such a fucking treasure

Submitted by whiskey on
Blimey, Chris! Is there something going on I've somehow missed...? Good poem, btw - great rhythm! :-)

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Thanks for reading J. There's nothing like a good rant to clear the Monday morning cobwebs and Guinness out of the system ;) 'You know, someone who cared about your opinion might get upset at this and feel bullied' If they thought it accurately described them and was actually about them, I suppose they could; I wonder will anyone lay claim though? ;) I apologize for the lack of thoughtfulness though and the 'vitriol' but I have included it (as I have for all my work, where it is present) only because it is relevant to the nature of the piece. Thanks for pointing out the typo; I had something else in there first and changed the sentence but forgot to change the 'your'. ;)

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Thanks whiskey, Lol no not really whiskey just a kind of rant type thingymajig ;)

Submitted by Jupiter on
Ha! Ha! I see you took on the IP idea then. That's the thing about defamation, it doesn't need to be accurate to bully does it? In fact most bullies tend to create and exaggerate in order to get noticed and ply their trade. I guess it's difficult on a site like this to be specific about a person without risking erasure by naming them. I feel sure though, given the abusive nature of the attack that should they see it they would reply directly if they felt they would not fall foul of the terms and conditions of the site. I know that if I felt it was about me and if it had been written by someone whose opinion I valued, I certainly would.

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Jupiter, It's obvious that you are not happy with this piece. Firstly you come on and tell me that you had hoped for more thought and less vitriol Then you basically accuse me of defamation and bullying. In the first place I did not write this, with pleasing you or anybody else in mind. You may have suggested the I.P. but that does not give you owners rights to every entrant. I am removing it from I.P. entry. Secondly I am not bullying anyone; I have not named anyone and it is quite simply A PIECE OF WORK! If you feel that it is in some way directed at you or someone you know, I would like to know why? I am considering removing it, just in case someone else decides to take it personally. I have no intention of writing stuff on here to bully, defame or upset anyone but neither am I prepared to remove work because it does not meet with your approval. I have been on this site since January and have never been accused of any of the above allegations. If you can offer any reason why you should take personal hurt from this piece, I will remove it immediately. I really am surprised by your attitude with regard to this piece. It is aimed at no individual and is a product of my imagination. I certainly know no-one on this site that I regard fits the 'target' of the piece; if I did, I would contact them by email and without any ambiguity. If of course you decide that you are the 'target' of the piece, I can assure you that you are wrong. If that does not suffice, then it's you that has a problem - not me! Furthermore, if you don't like my work, then simply don't read it; I am not craving your attention or approval. Oh, by the way, thanks for reading!

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Thanks for the cherry folks ;)

Submitted by Jupiter on
Ha! Ha! A cherry. I love it. :-). I just won £20! Tragic though really! A good poem, a thumbs up to bullying, or both? What do you think? Astonished to see a site like this reward such a piece written by a self-proclaimed 'christian'? Me too. Haven't seen Tony or Ewan on for hours so perhaps FTSE holds the key. Any idea who cherried this and why FTSE - just out of interest - you know?

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
What is your problem? I don't know what to say to you J. If you have a problem with this, go and complain to the editors and maybe tell them why; surely someone should know! Then maybe they can explain it to me. The only conclusion that I can come to, is that you see yourself in this piece. That being the case, what does it say about you? Do you see yourself in any other poems and if so should they all be pulled off, just to keep your insecurities at bay? For God's sake, get a grip man! IT'S JUST A PIECE OF WORK!

Submitted by Jupiter on
Nobody is taken in Chris. Regardless of who it is about, it is about someone here and it is designed to bully, as is born out by your earlier response, and as I have repeatedly said I hate bullying. "'You know, someone who cared about your opinion might get upset at this and feel bullied' If they thought it accurately described them and was actually about them, I suppose they could; I wonder will anyone lay claim though? ;)" As I said previously, I am astonished primarily to see such a piece written by you as a self-proclaimed 'christian' and secondly to see someone on this site reward what appears to be such an obviously bullying piece. And what is the point of complaining to someone who awarded it a cherry eh? I think all is clear now - for the fourth time.

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
I wrote that reply because I couldn't see anyone in their right mind claiming it was about them! It is NOT obviously about anyone on this site; it is an exaggerated IMAGINARY rant about an IMAGINARY person...but you know what Jupiter; if the cap fits, by all means wear it!

Submitted by sarah wilson on
Congratulations on the cherry Chris - for a well written, humorous piece of work with excellent rhythm:)

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Thanks Sarah, much appreciated ;)

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Thanks for clearing that up Paul, appreciated!

Submitted by Sikander on
Blimey... Well, ducking in after the row, I'd just like to say what a great poem, threeleaf! Deserved cherry for a really felt and well imaginined piece of writing - more of the same please! Sx

Submitted by threeleafshamrock on
Thanks Sikander ;) for taking the time and for the nice comments; appreciated!