THE DECORATOR GIRL

Five foot two
With eyes of blue
There ain’t nothin’ that this kid can’t do.

So I’m sitting in the corner
Watching her work
She’s a genuine first edition
Decorator Girl.

They say nothin’ could be finer
Than to be in Carolina
But I’d rather be home
When she’s laying on the primer.

So if you need some colour
Splashed across your wall
Then do yourself a favour
And give this girl a call.

Ochre, Magnolia, Sunset Yellow
Mixed up to make your life more mellow,
In the kitchen, bathroom, closet or bed
With colours designed to mess up your head.

With rub down, primer and a second layer
She’s the new star signing
A real team player.

So watch her go
And see what I mean
She’s the lazy mans ultimate fantasy dream.

Wickes, Wilco, B & Q,
There ain’t nothing that the girl can’t do
She’s my domestic goddess and I simply adore her
But all she does is paint me into a corner.

She moves like lightning
Such dangerous curves
It’s the strokes that provoke
That Decorator Girl.

Now you don’t know her
So you’ll have to take my word
Even though you’re probably thinking
This whole thing sounds absurd.
But I don’t drink, smoke or inhale
And all my senses are right on the nail
So I can speak with some authority
That kid really struts her stuff for me
So why in the world
Would I need to be bluffing?
When I’ve got a Decorator Girl
That will do it for nothing.

Oh how I wish I could bottle her up
Dispense her services cup by cup
But she don’t love me
She thinks I’m a jerk
That hazy, crazy
Decorator Girl.

So a word to the wise
If your life’s in a mess
Relax your mind
And reduce your stress
Take my advice
And change your world
Let me give you the number
Of my Decorator Girl.

She’s five foot two
With eyes of blue
And there’s nothing that the kid can’t do
In a box room, castle or narrow boat
Let her give your life a second coat.
Forget your troubles, tears and woes,
And watch her paint her nails, face and toes
But remember this when you’ve paid your fee
That the Decorator Girl
She belongs to me.