'Snuff' by Chuck Pahlaniuk.

‘Here have a look at this Dick,’says retired porn magnate Oscar Pruriente one day by the pool. ‘Tell me what you think.’

He passes me a book, ‘Snuff’ by Chuck Palahniuk. It’s a slim volume …196 pages in brown print. Brown print? Bronzer. That’s novel I think. Right on the cutting edge. I am familiar with Mr. Palahniuk’s work already from ‘Fight Club’. It was made into a film. He has sold quite of lot of books and become something of a cult figure.

On the back is a brief teaser. “Six hundred dudes. One porn queen. A world record for the ages…” And that’s what it turns out to be. The story of how six hundred cocks enter the cunt of Cassie Wright, ‘the only performer who knows how to hold a speculum’, so that a movie can be made to commemorate the event and thousands of units can be sold to wankers everywhere who weren’t invited to attend the actual shafting. Along the way we meet Mr. 72, a young dude eager to please who thinks he may be Cassie’s lovechild, Mr. 137 a washed-up soap actor and Mr. 600 aka Branch Bacardi, a jaded veteran of the porn industry who spends a lot of time preening his pudenda. Mostly they hang out eating nachos waiting for the wrangler with the clipboard to call their numbers. Cassie Wright herself, the object of their affection, comes across as a bit sad. They all do really. Maybe that’s the point. Hard to say.

If you’re in the mood for a bit of envelope pushing for its own sake you may be disappointed. There are lots of filthy puns and plenty of sensationalistic subject matter but the author seems to be suffering shock fatigue with this one. ‘Snuff’ is a provocative title designed to attract another level of macabre readers but it doesn’t work. A few porn stars die on the job but nobody actually gets snuffed. There’s no story line, which is fine, but the whole thing is somewhat lacking in substance. There isn’t even any good irony to speak of. Just a lot of dudes getting their rocks off. If this is the way ahead then literature is in serious trouble.

‘Aren’t you being a little harsh Dick?’ says Oscar after skimming through the above.
‘No’ I say, ‘I’m being kind. It’s tripe but I’m sure Palahniuk’s fans will think it’s cool. Especially the toilet jokes.’

Did I say tripe? Well perhaps that isn’t quite fair. The thing about Chuck is he isn’t bad at elaborating on a basic idea but when you get right down to it he doesn’t have a lot to say. Read it yourself if you want. It’s all written in a very dry way. You’ll learn a thing or two about underpants, prison tattoos, junk food, and the side-effects of Sildenafil (nausea, leg-swelling, blindness) and you’ll gain a few insights into the porn industry. He does his homework. And he certainly captures the boredom.

I should mention 'Snuff' is based loosely on Annabel Chong's revealing documentary which in turn deals with her starring role in 'The World's Greatest Gang Bang'. Which means if 'Snuff' gets made into a film it will disappear up its own bunghole. Another taboo shattered.