Captive
By MistakenMagic
Mon, 15 Mar 2010
- 6129 reads
23 comments
The sun shimmers -
a coin in the fountain of sky,
blue waters
minting light.
Its bright orb
snared
by a net
of jet black branches
that coax it,
closer,
into the melting pot
of the horizon.
The trees form
such strange veins
of writing -
I wonder
at the semantics
of these living hieroglyphs,
waving silently
on a pastel page
of sky-skin.
So much light and colour -
and the promise of spring.
And it feels now
as if nothing
in this life
will be as perfect
as this moment ...
This perfect moment,
held captive;
a shining equilibrium.
A sun amongst branches
of trees.
- Log in to post comments
Comments
This is really beautiful
This is really beautiful Magic, I especially love the branches being writing & the sun melting over the horizon. Kahdai xxx
"I will make sense with a few reads \^^/ "
- Log in to post comments
I am sure I have seen I
I am sure I have seen I picture like it somewhere ;) xxx
"I will make sense with a few reads \^^/ "
- Log in to post comments
Of course, :) they go
Of course, :) they go together lovely! Like cheese on toast, melting over the horizon ^^ xxxK
"I will make sense with a few reads \^^/ "
- Log in to post comments
Just perfect, Magic;-) As
Permalink Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
Just perfect, Magic;-)
As you know, I too sure those amazing photographs and to say this poem of yours does them justice, is an understatement. The seeming simplicity of the last stanza is so very effective.
Much enjoyed.
Tina xxx
- Log in to post comments
Hi Rebecca, this has to one
Hi Rebecca, this has to one of the best "descriptive" poems I have ever read. I haven't seen the photos in question but I don't need to, your words paint a far better picture than a mere photo ever could.
David xx :--)
- Log in to post comments
And congratulations on
And congratulations on Durham - you'll have a good time there!
- Log in to post comments
The first stanza is just
The first stanza is just perfect, particularly
"a coin in the fountain of sky"
What a beautiful piece, Magic.
- Log in to post comments
I liked the structure - like
I liked the structure - like something from the Tao Te Ching - works well at capturing a moment. And the trees making writing feels quite Taoist and calligraphic as well. I'll have a look at the photo at some point but it's nice to savour the mental image for a while first.
Durham is a great place ...
- Log in to post comments
This is so beautiful Magic,
This is so beautiful Magic, I really enjoyed.
The images are amazing, this is my favourite stanza. Although it was very hard to pick (;
"The trees form
such strange veins
of writing -
I wonder
at the semantics
of these living hieroglyphs,
waving silently
on a pastel page
of sky-skin."
Beeme xx
k.
- Log in to post comments
Excellent. Please check your
Permalink Submitted by Belle Green on
Excellent. Please check your e-mail or e-mail me:)Abctales print magazine:)
- Log in to post comments
new MistakenMagic Congrats;
Permalink Submitted by Cavalcader on
new MistakenMagic
Congrats; on the cherry!
Also I see your going to Durham
we went break for a week nice.
I have clicked on.Lovely photos.
This poem is good words and picturesque
names;
This perfect moment
held captive,
a shining equilibrium,
A sun amongst branches
of trees.
words in the fourth stanza
As if feels now
as if nothing
in this life1
will be as perfect
as this moment...
"One moment in time"
The third time I emailed
to local paper put in poem sometimes.
called "Russett Leaves" we attached photo
little garden here, magnificent sight "Russett Leaves"all the hedge green,then turned russett.
so tried again.
it got the cherry!
But still not there in paper yet!
Guarantee on Abctales though.wow!
all the best
julie x
- Log in to post comments