The time to Die

The Time to Die

Laura Chalker leaned back in her chair, the silence drew out between them, her patient, a fifteen year old, who always wore a black velvet choker, would be the first to speak.
‘I can’t answer that question.’
‘You tried to hang yourself, but you don’t know why?’
‘Always the same questions, over and over again. I’ve told you everything that I can. It’s the same ones week after week, month after month. Why can’t you just let me be?’
‘Because you have to understand that you’re not well, Jade. Why did you try to hang yourself?’
‘It’s my time to die, that’s all.’
‘That’s all? You say it so dismissively; I think it’s a pretty big deal, don’t you? The girl shrugged, her fingers comfort stroking the arm of the leather recliner in which she sat. ‘When a fifteen year old girl with everything in front of her tells me that she wants to die, I take that very seriously.’
‘I never said that I want to die. I have to?’
‘Why?’
‘Because it’s my time.’
Jade, you’ve been saying that for twelve months now. It’s a year since the accident. You’ve punished yourself enough and it’s time to give yourself a break.’
‘No, it’s time to die. I should have died with the others, we all should. And everyday that you keep me here is going to make it harder for me, afterwards.’
‘Who says? Who says there even is an afterwards. You’re being pretty presumptuous, aren’t you?’
‘Caroline says.’
‘Caroline’s dead, Jade.’
‘Exactly.’