Crimson Tear

By Bryan Skylar

Sat, 04 Aug 2012
  • 1357 reads
5 comments
 

White silver streaks
Shadows dance and shadows fleet
One with the night
Her embrace so sweet
Chills ageless shallow cheeks

Steadfast, yet patiently he seeks
Through back alley and busy street
Insatiable hunger at its peak
He is nobility
Hunting not the meek

Perhaps a fair maiden
A gilded young lad
The next must outclass
The whore he last had
Her blood was warm

Brief company not bad
He grows impatient
Half a night lost
Could take anyone
Yet, is it worth the cost

Alas, a perfect doth appear
Tis you my friend?
No need to fear
It all ends swift
As you shed a crimson tear

Certificate PG
Poem
Horror

Comments

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
Hi Bryan. A powerful poem, the menacing tone comes across well. I note the lack of punctuation, which aids the flow, but I think you might consider a ? at the end of the second to last stanza, which not only clarifies the meaning but would give a small dramatic pause before the killer takes up the pace again and moves swiftly on to his next victim. A good read. Linda

Linda

Submitted by Bryan Skylar on
Thanks, Linda. I took your fine advice on adding the question mark. I'm pleased that you enjoyed the poem. If you have anything you'd like for me to read just ask.

Submitted by Parson Thru on
Hi Bryan. Very Gothic, but timeless in a way too. I also like the detached style you have written it in. Nice flow, too. Enjoyed.

Parson Thru

Submitted by Bryan Skylar on
Hello, Parson. I agree with you that it can be Gothic, but also timeless as well. It pleases me that you enjoyed it. If you have anything you'd like for me to read of yours just tell me. ;)

Submitted by Natalia on
Great poem! Very moving, and when I say this I don't mean moving as in sad, but moving as in stirring thoughts. Well done.

Natalia :)