Lorry Man

Cherry

By Jane Hyphen

Thu, 24 Jan 2013
  • 2764 reads
9 comments
 

Lorry man
Man in a lorry
Cut into my lane
And he never said sorry

Lettuce in the back
Lettuce in transit
Cut it up small
And have it with an omelette

Coming up the rear
Black BMW
Headlights flashing
Doing it to trouble you

Don't cave in
Road rage baiter!
Not my problem
If he arrives a little later

4 by 4
Chelsea tractor
Nail extensions
Driven by a raptor

Kids in the back
Messing with an i-pad
Children these days
So much more than I had!

Nearly there
Stuck behind a van-man
Switching lanes
And chomping on wigwam

Naked girl
Tattooed on his left wrist
Chatting on the phone
And swearing at a cyclist

Car park full!
Belly starts churning
Looking for a space
And involuntary gurning

Small for a Saab
Smaller for a Lexus
Tight little spaces
Guaranteed to vex us

Radio off
Suddenly so rowdy
Turn into the space
And I'm inches from an Audi

Put it in reverse
Beeps start sounding
Sweat glands open
Heart starts pounding

Here at last!
Relieved to be arriving
I'm terrible at parking
And I don't like driving!

Certificate U
Poem
Bastards
Humour

Comments

Submitted by sid on
I like this very much! Especially '4 by 4 Chelsea tractor Nail extensions Driven by a raptor' Those 4x4 women are my pet hate/favourite ranting topic. I wouldn't hate them so if they weren't all so sodding miserable and displeased with everything! Oh, off I go again... Good one

 

Submitted by blighters rock on
Love it, especially involuntary gurning.

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on
Thank you so much! I know exactly what you mean sid. Sometimes I make an effort not to gurn but then invariably my tongue comes out, not sure what's worse. Maybe I should stop driving.

 

Submitted by Bee on
This is really unusual. It's sort of blunt and crisp. I liked the style and enjoyed your poem. Bee
Bee

Submitted by MS on
Fun read, thanks for being relatively gentle on the transit drivers. I own one, but i'm not one.

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on
Thank you for all your comments. It's just a bit of fun really. Wrote the first bit while driving because I was so annoyed about the lettuce lorry cutting me up.

 

Submitted by Valerie on
great rhythm to this and very funny!

Valerie

Submitted by sid on
'Lettuce in transit' makes me happy

 

Submitted by Di_Hard on

Very clever, the rhymes and angry beat, I can feel your stress.Makes me glad I can't drive!