The Welcoming

My name is Anabelle and I am twelve years old. It’s my birthday today and the best day of my life because today is the day I get welcomed. Everyone gets welcomed on their twelfth birthday because that is when you are an adult.
I don’t really know what happens when you’re welcomed but it must be good because everyone tells me what an honour it is and my mum keeps hugging me and she’s braided my hair so I look pretty for the leader.
I’m glad my hair is in a braid too because normally it’s just loose and it’s so long I can sit on it but it gets tangled and caught and it hurts. I tried to cut it off once but mum caught me. She hit me a lot and locked me in the bad place for days. But today I can finally have a braid like the older girls because that’s how The Leader likes it.
I think about how I’ll be allowed to talk to boys tomorrow. Girls and boys are kept separate until after the welcoming because boys aren’t pure, but when I meet The Leader my purity will be protected and I can talk to everyone which is good because I think I like boys and I have two brothers who I can play with.
I’m thinking about my sister a lot today and how I haven’t seen her for a long time. She didn’t like being welcomed, which is weird because everyone here is jealous when it’s someone elses turn. She ran away two years ago and tried to make me go with her, but she was scaring me so I stayed. I really miss her, but I can’t tell anyone as they’ll be mad with me. My mum says my sister ran away because she is disloyal and impure.
I sometimes wonder where she is. I worry about her out in the big world because no one will know her name and the people hurt each other all the time. It’s not safe like it is here. Dad says she’s probably dead which makes me sad, but she shouldn’t have left.
Melanie is helping me get ready. She was the last girl to be welcomed so she helps me, and I’ll help the next girl. We are in my bedroom and she brings in the special Welcoming dress. It’s white with blue ribbons and it’s beautiful. All my clothes are grey and I’m really excited to wear such a pretty dress. I put it on and look in the mirror and I smile because I think The Leader will be happy.
It was only three months ago that Melanie wore the dress. She cried for days when she was welcomed and that made me very scared, but when I asked her why she said they were happy tears. I don’t know why you would cry if you were happy? I start to get really scared and I can’t stop shaking and gasping for air. My chest hurts and my eyes start to burn with tears. Melanie sees me and grabs my shoulders.
‘It’s ok Ana. Don’t cry. After tonight you will be so happy and you’ll be pure forever. Trust me.’ But all I can think about is how sad she was, and how scared my sister was and I wish she was here. But then I feel guilty because I’m betraying The Leader and everyone says he can tell when people think impure thoughts and then I won’t be accepted and I’ll have to live in the bad place for a long time.
I begin to calm down and Melanie lets go of my shoulders.
‘What’s going to happen Melanie?’ I whisper so no one hears.
Melanie walks towards me and slaps me hard across the face. My cheek starts burning.
‘You know we can’t talk about that. He’ll know.’ She hugs me, ‘I’m sorry Ana. Did I hurt you?’
My hand goes up to my cheek and I can see in the mirror it’s turning red. Melanie rushes me into the bathroom and washes my face with cold water.
‘You can’t go in with a mark on your face Ana, he won’t be pleased with you.’ I start to get worried and wash my face furiously. The red eventually disappears and I feel a bit better.
We leave the bathroom and Melanie leads me out of the barn and across the garden to the big house. Everyone is outside waiting for me and the house is decorated with hundreds of candles and they look like stars.
I see my mum and dad and I want to run over but I know I’m not allowed so I just smile. My mum looks so proud and that makes me happy. As I enter the house everyone starts clapping and I feel really good. All my worry vanishes and I can’t wait to meet The Leader.
Melanie walks me upstairs and down a long corridor. It’s the first time I’ve been in the big house and there are so many doors I’m sure I’ll be lost all the time when I live here. There is a large white door at the end of the hallway and Melanie stops.
‘That’s where you have to go Ana. I have to go back now.’
I nod and smile as Melanie hugs me really tight. I watch her walk away and I stay there until she’s gone. It’s really quiet now and I feel nervous as I walk towards the door. I hope he likes me.
I knock lightly and I hear a soft voice calling me in. I open the door and see a room filled with candles. It looks so beautiful I don’t know why I was so worried, because this is what I’ve been waiting for.
I shut the door behind me.