Gift

Cherry

By Bee

Tue, 13 May 2014
  • 8994 reads
17 comments
 

Standing in the centre of the living room of this house I've polished from top to bottom in anticipation of your arrival, my heart beats fit to burst. I can barely catch a breath as I wipe the sweat from my hands on my apron and attempt to contain my excitement.

I have painted your old bedroom blue again, and bought a Spider-Man spread for the bed where I have left the gift I wrapped for him. The tag reads - 'From Granny' - I hope he likes it, as you would have done at that age. I hope he likes me. In all his seven years, we've never met.

Opening the door, I see immediately that you are alone. I smile and nod at the explanation as to why it wasn't possible to bring him with you on this occasion. I say I understand, and while you go upstairs to shower and change after your long flight, I take myself to the garden shed. I'll need a moment to compose myself; come back in and splash my face at the kitchen sink. All is fine. I guess I let my expectations run too high.

Certificate U
Story
Other Fiction

Comments

Submitted by jolono on

Tugged at my hearts strings here Bee. Not much of it, but what there is says so much. Well thought out piece.

 

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks jolono. I was trying to get as much info into as short a story as possible without losing the feeling. I'm thrilled you thought it worked. 

Bee

Submitted by Ray Schaufeld on

Short, and poignant. And Granny probably sweeps all her pain and disappointment into her kitchen cupboard                    Elsie

Submitted by Bee on

Hi Elsie.

Yes, she probably would. Thank you for your lovely comments.

Bee

Submitted by Bee on

Thank you, cherry picker, for cheering my day.

Bee

Submitted by hudsonmoon on

A lot said, indeed, Bee. You could almost feel her whole history with a few well chosen words. Not an easy task.

Rich x

 

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks Rich. Pleased you got so much from it. 

Bee x

Bee

Submitted by Ed Crane on

You've capture the disappointment and infinite understanding so many modern Grandparents have to endure. So much said in so few words.

Best to you

K

 

Submitted by Bee on

Ed, thank you for your kind comments.

Very much appreciated,

Bee

Submitted by jeand on

Hi Bee,

I too could feel your anticipation and then your disappointment, but it must have been lovely seeing your daughter again after all those years. And there will be more occasions, I am sure.

Jean

Jean Day

Submitted by Bee on

Hi Jean.

So pleased that you saw the contrast of the excitement of anticipation and disappointment. It is fiction, but I'm glad you found it convincing as a story. Also, I had intended that it was a son, but I see from your comment that it could be taken as either. After all, girls can have a blue bedroom, too. I did - when I was young. 

I got such a lot from your comments, Jean. And my daughter is coming home from America next month - with babies. I can't wait. 

Thank you for your much valued thoughts,

Bee

Submitted by RJF on

This is absolutely heartbreaking Bee and beautifully written; pure and powerful. Rx

 

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks so much, R - such a nice thing to say.

Bee x

Bee

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on

Bee...SUPERlativesmiley

Tina

 

Submitted by Bee on

Thank you so much, Tina. 

Hope you are enjoying sunshine today. smiley

Bee

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

The poignancy and tension of the situation, and her near desperation to achieve the contact/relationship  well caught. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Bee on

Thank you, Rhiannon. Pleased you thought so.

Bee