My Parents

By hedgehog1

Wed, 13 Sep 2017
  • 1403 reads
6 comments
 

Lying in his hospital bed waiting

Seeing nothing the stroke has claimed his mind.

She sat by his bed hoping

Waiting for some new event: her eyes fixed

On the shadows overhead

Miracles do happen, but not this time.

 

Looking back a smile comes over her face remembering,

They had come together in time of war.

Their whole life was a preparation for this event

After sixty six years of marriage now separated; but not apart

Closer now she must face her last years without him

As this long last night claims his soul for eternity.

 

The silence between them speaks his time has run its course 

Kissing him gently as she said her goodbyes

Their hands locked together for one last time

Tears form and fall gently from her face. Do they know they're old?

These two who are my father and my mother,

Whose fire from which I came, has now grown cold.

Certificate U
Poem
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Love

Comments

Submitted by Insertponceyfre... on

A finely drawn pen portrait Edward. If you're looking for suggestions I'd take another look at the punctuation which seems a bit random in some places eg:

'As this long last night; claims his soul for eternity'

 

Submitted by hedgehog1 on

Thank you for your comments "Insert" not having a very good formal education punctuation is not one of my strong points. "Must try harder" comes to mind as I pen my poems.

Edward

 

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

A gentle scene, which seems such a dignified picture of peace and patience and hope, carefully worded and drawn. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by hedgehog1 on

Thank you Rhiannon, this was not the easiest of poems to pen as I watched my mother sit quietly by my fathers side as he slowly passed away. Your comments are so appropriate for this poem, I really appreciate them.

Edward

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

I felt such saddness as I read your poem Edward. To loose a loved one is so painful. I can't imagine loosing my partner, it would be like loosing a part of me, all the security of a soul mate who you've shared so many years with, suddenly gone forever, it doesn't bear thinking about.

I think you've tackled this situation in this poem exactly right.

That last stanza was what really touched my emotions. I remember holding my dad's hand as he took his very last breath.  A tear jerker indeed.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by hedgehog1 on

Thank you Jenny for your thoughtful way you summed up the loss of my father. Your words mean so much to me.

Edward