2017 Poetry Medley

Poetically,

2017 started with a forgotten copse, once walked.

My mother in tow of a gaggle of little kids

I rose early with mine one Sunday,

breakfast in a bag,

a flask of tea,

excited to take them on the walk I took

when I was full of life, like them.

 

Everything means my mother,

a woman of international pride,

a woman who felt the true concerns

of the living, breathing earth.

She felt the pain of plight

and shook off the shackles 

put upon us by society,

grasping the freedom 

to choose who we ought to be -

and who we ought to be 

is love and peace.

 

Without missing a beat,

I wind a meandering path

from Pope and Shakespeare to Plath

recalling once more,

while standing in Tesco

on the grubby tiled floor -

a desire to shout -

an overwhelming urge

to call out,

absurd,

yearning delusion

 

wells a pregnant drip.

Drip drop, then what?

Looks of pity -

mad woman,

 

yelling for mother

in the middle of a shop.

Instead

walk out

 

head drooped.

Drop falls from broken lip,

unheard, the word...

"Mum?"

 

Where are you Mum!

When we were on holiday by the sea

A lazy holiday,

where we could sit

and eat and drink 

and read.

We’ll come back

when we meet again. 

Take a long walk by the sea,

curl up by the fire

with a glass of wine

and laugh some more

about that funny cheese.

 

Transported by the sound of the waves.

I’m back to her final sleep.

she will dream of oceans

and soft sand beneath her feet.

 

I waited for death,

one year on.

Losing her 

all over again. 

 

The lamp is lit,

A light shines brightly

for no one to see.

If we die, what will be?

Ripple out across the sea -

a drop in the ocean.

Unseen,

Invisible me.

 

I wish you’d been here to see

My growing new sense of self-esteem

Not worrying about what others are thinking.

I wish you were here for me to share

when I’d chopped off all hair.

I thought you’d be cross

because you’d always been a bit precious -

but that had never been me.

It was everything within -

the intelligence you passed

that gave me pride.

 

The woman I would like to be -

just like you

is beautiful inside. 

 

I treasure the these invisible gems in my heart,

though sad with the knowledge you’re dead

I continue without you another year,

freestyling it from your words in my head.