The Mystery Of The Heinz Salad Cream With 30% Less Fat.

I grew up with Heinz Tomato Ketchup and had it with every meal and snack, but not with cereal, from a very young age. Once a year I would go away to my god-mothers in St Annes, she didn’t allow me to have it in the quantities, I was accustomed to at home, with my god-mother I was only allowed a spot on my plate, the size of a penny! At home, there was no limit, hence when I returned home a week later, my share was still in the tomato ketchup bottle, and it was a bit like a drug, to see it, to smell it, to shake it out and eat it, nothing came close, when it came to food. It completed my meal. I didn’t care how posh the restaurant was, when my meal arrived if there wasn’t any red sauce offered or still not on the table I would say, “Please can I have some tomato ketchup?” The Server would reply, “Yes of course, I will get you some.” Some of my friends, family or colleagues would say to me, “They won’t have it here, it’s too posh,” Some restaurant Servers, would say, “I will check to see if we have any,” And usually I would hit the jack pot, for a bottle unopened of Heinz or tomato ketchup poured into a small dish or saucer would arrive at my side, and as I said, “Thank you,” Those with me would suddenly become brave and there would be various voices from around the table saying, “Can I have some too please?” I am a trendsetter that way.

Even at my wedding, at the reception, my Mistress of Ceremonies gave a bottle to my new Husband, and said, “You will need this.”

We have two kids, Daniel and Meghan, Daniel wasn’t bothered, what Daniel and myself had in common was we love cake and custard for breakfast! Meghan doesn’t like gravy or custard! How can she be an offspring of mine? I can never have enough gravy or custard on my plate or in my dish. But yes, she is indeed an offspring of mine for she really, really loves tomato ketchup! When her grandparents took her out, for McDonald’s, they said, “Meghan drinks tomato ketchup with her meal,” She did indeed, for when money was tight, I used tomato ketchup less and less so Meghan would not miss out, the kid comes first, I’m a good Mum that way. I did the same with yoghurts, I used to have it every day, before the kids were born, but after they were born, I gave it to them instead. So, years later as a young Mum, when I would sometimes go out with my friends, who we all used to go out before we got married, they would be really surprised when I didn’t have tomato ketchup, shocked even.

Then about four years ago, something strange happened, I tried Heinz Salad Cream, I had eaten it as a child, and liked it, and when mayonnaise came along, I liked that too, and there was a difference between the two, to me one was stronger in taste. I had rekindled my love for Heinz Salad Cream, and really loved it a lot. So much so, that I buy the 570ml bottle and have it with every meal but not cereal. But now as an adult, I don’t just buy one bottle, oh no, I buy one every time I go to Tesco, so I have some in various work bags, some in the cupboards, some in my locker at work, and on the tiny wooden table next to my sofa. All the bottles are of different levels of full, half full or less than half full! Before this, I would run out, and that was not good, so I made sure, I am never without Heinz Salad Cream again, as I really enjoy it with my meals. The only thing I have tomato ketchup with, is when I go to McDonald’s, I ask for two pots and dip each fry into it, until both of them are finished.

I went shopping on Saturday, and when I came home and emptied my shopping bag, I saw something odd in the bag, there were two Heinz Salad Cream, that was odd enough because I don’t usually buy two bottles but one but the odd thing, odder that the two bottles was that one of them was 30% less fat!! I would never buy that. So how did it get into my bag? I didn’t know, and it did trouble me the thought that there were two of them, and one of them was wrong.

The following day, when my mind was relaxed, I realized what must have happened. Sometimes, the dividers although they are there, food items fall over onto the other side, of the divider, with the sometimes-jerking movement of the conveyer belt, I am sure that is what happened on Saturday, so I came home with the next customers’ 30% less fat and they went home with nothing. Usually, it happens on the conveyer belt and it is given back to the next customer, but it wasn’t spotted, so I’m stuck with it, but actually I can’t tell the difference, so all’s well that ends well.