Pearly Gates : A Tour of Russia’s Hell by Alfred N.Muggins Part 3
By David Kirtley
- 386 reads
7/10/23 / 21/2/24 ,/ 3/3/24
“You are now on the tour of the Hell you created,” said his guide. The strong presence of Rasputin seemed to have reappeared now that Putin was away from the awful presence of Grandfather Stalin. Even fearless Rasputin, it seemed, was scared of that particular monster from Russia’s past, despite being very much dead, and belied his own words. “Come don’t be afraid! After all you are already dead!”
Babies cried out in the darkness. An apartment disappeared, its debris falling through the floor into the one below. A woman’s head was sliced by shrapnel! She fell instantly, lifeless beneath the collapse of a wall. She had been an infant school teacher at the local school. Her grandfather, a Russian speaker like herself, had driven a tank at the famous Battle of Kursk, in which the German invaders had been soundly defeated by Zhukov’s full frontal tank attacks. Her husband was no longer in his chair. A gaping hole full of smoke had taken his place. This particular apartment had been built during erstwhile Soviet leader Krushchev’s reign, he who had himself been from Ukraine. Which side do you think he would have been on in this war if he had been born two generations later?
“Can I feel the explosions? asked the President of the Russian Federation. He had never thought that he may one day have to stand in the path of his own toy fleet’s missiles, as they came screeching into the sides of inhabited buildings in Ukrainian cities.
How is it that we are here, or that hell seems so real? This seems real to me, but how can it be here.?
“Vladimir, it was you who created this, no one else! It was your will that created this conflict. It was you who ordered the armed forces to attack the civilian apartments.”
“We had to put the fear into the Ukrainian resistance! Our initial tactics of marching our columns into Kiev and Kharkov had failed, so we had to work on the locals’ morale,” admitted the smartly dressed premier.
He is suddenly caught by a missile fired from the Black Sea Toyship Fleet! The apartment he is visiting is destroyed and he falls with the masonry into the apartments below. A mother screams as Putin’s head falls into her lap, soon to be stifled as she is buried alive in the falling masonry. Vladimir could not help thinking she looked indistinguishable from Russian women as her body was covered and crushed. In the aftermath his body resurrected itself. He was no longer mortal and could not be harmed, except psychologically. Briefly he had felt the pain of severe injury and death. He had felt the fear, the horror, and the pain he had inflicted upon these citizens of the Socialist Republic of Ukraine. It was not nice. Perhaps he could feel guilt? But Vladimir ‘lived on’ in hell. He could still blame the Kulaks, the Nazis, the Ukrainian speakers, the Traitors to Mother Russia, NATO and the Americans, the Poles and the Germans, the soft shopkeeping British Imperialists, the growing Empire of the European Union, the immoral gays, and the greedy businesses who turned away from Mother Russia, towards new markets in the West! He could still blame anyone and everyone except himself!
- Log in to post comments
Comments
I guess Putin, like the moron
I guess Putin, like the moron's moron, Trump (but not Mr Muggins) can and does blame everyone but himself.
- Log in to post comments
Rasputin
Archaic verse from the East tells us this...
There lived a certain man in Russia long ago. He was big and strong, in his eyes a flaming glow. Most people looked at him with terror and with fear but to Moscow chicks he was such a lovely dear. He could preach the Bible like a preacher, full of ecstasy and fire, but he also was the kind of teacher women would desire.
Turlough
- Log in to post comments
The Mad Monk
It would be terrible of me to take any credit for the words of the poem about the Mad Monk.
I offer my sincere apologies to Alfred and to any reader who feels they might have been misled.
Clicking on the link will reveal the terrible truth.
Turlough
- Log in to post comments
Was talking about Putin only
Was talking about Putin only yesterday. History has a habit of repeating itself so I wondered whether he would be airbrushed from history in the same way Stalin was in Russia after his death. I'm sure they would make good soul brothers if they meet in the Afterlife.
- Log in to post comments