A Lakeland Outing

A LAKELAND OUTING

Well, I thought. Perhaps one way to repair the rift was to arrange an outing to the lakes. The family, especially my wife, Eileen, was upset about Maria's allegation that Rob was on drugs. The kids seemed ambivalent about it all but for Eileen's sake I thought I should try something.

Eileen thought it wasn't a bad idea. She had a few misgivings but agreed to 'phone everyone up and ask if they would like to join us next weekend. Drive to the lakes, good hotel, boat trip through Ullswater and dinner at the hotel. Back on Sunday morning. Perfect.

Eileen got busy on the 'phone. I agreed Annie could bring Eammon, although I have to confess I wasn't too keen on him. I thought he was an Irish waster but I didn't think our daughter would come if she couldn't bring her euphemistically titled "partner. Secretly I thought she only put up with him because she felt that her weight precluded her attracting anyone else, despite her job as a high-powered analyst.

Our younger daughter, Jill said she would come. Jill was less insecure. She worked as a P.A to the Chairman of her company and earned quite well but I didn't think she'd refuse. Anything for a freebie and Rob, son and trouble was fairly non-commital. That accounted for all the kids who were obviously reluctant but prepared to humour their aged ' P's. We still didn't have an answer from Maria, Eileen's sister with whom the real problem lay. Maria is the exact opposite to Eileen. Thin and dark to Eileen's blonde curviness. She and Rob had a set-to about his way of life. Admittedly, he was a bit much. Didn't get up before 2p.m. and stayed out until 2 next morning. Often he didn't come home at all. Maria thought he was buying and selling drugs. He denied it. Jill stuck up for him. Annie shrugged her shoulders. Secretly I thought it was more likely Eammon was the dealer but decided to keep my counsel. I hoped once the cast was assembled, the truth would come to light. I thought Rob was just leading the life of Riley ' living at home, straight out of Uni, no job on the horizon but Eileen didn't seem to mind. I would have sleeping dogs lie, but she was upset about the rift in the family.

In the end they all agreed and I booked the hotel, sorted the Jag out ' Eammon was going to bring his own car - and we agreed to set off about 10 on the Saturday. Frankly I doubted Eammon would make it in his clapped out Toyata but I had to hope for the best. There didn't seem to be an alternative as I didn't feel like hiring a more up-to-date model for him to drive.

As one might imagine, it was raining ' which not to put too fine a point on it ' was rather dampening ' but I suppose it was to be expected. It was only April and you couldn't really expect the sun to come out much before June if you lived near Manchester. Still with a bit of luck it might shine for a short while when we reached the lakes and the hotel looked promising. Getting five rooms was a piece of luck and hopefully they would all have decent views. To avoid any problems on the journey Eammon agreed to take Jill and Rob so that we could take Maria. Thus leaving the hoped for reconciliation to the boat trip.

I reckoned the journey to Ullswater trip would take about two and a half hours ' motorway practically all the way ' shouldn't have to do much map reading. Just the bit from Penrith to the lake itself so nobody would get lost.

Of course, the first hurdle would be getting Rob out of bed and down to Annie's before Maria arrived but fortunately, Annie had a put-u-up in her flat and she suggested Rob should stay there. That just meant Jill had to drive her Mini over to her and they could all start from there. Great idea. At least the journey would be hassle free. We agreed we would lunch separately on the way up to the hotel so I decided to do a little detour to a place I knew near Kendal. Quite a decent restaurant, then aim to be in Ullswater about 2 o'clock. Annie said they'd probably stop off on the motorway. So far, so good.

Maria arrived early and we managed to set off on time, hoping that Annie had managed to get Rob out of bed. We got to Kendal easily and after a pleasant lunch (I hoped that when Maria was full of alcohol she might be less judgmental) and arrived at the hotel in good time.

The first difficulty ' the rooms. Both doubles had lake views but the singles looked over the garden and one was over the kitchen. A discussion took place between Eileen and Maria. Maria wasn't happy. She really is a pain in the neck. "Perhaps she thought, "the girls could double up and the men take the single rooms. So much for a pleasant family outing and I couldn't see Annie agreeing but we said we'd wait for the others before making a decision. This wasn't going quite the way I'd planned it. Of course, one way to settle it was to see if I could have five double rooms ' all with lake views but that would set me back another 500 quid and I wasn't too keen on that. I just hoped Eileen didn't suggest it.

Then, of course, the inevitable 'phone call. Eammon had a puncture. He had changed the wheel but his car had that temporary tyre and he would have to find a garage to get the proper one mended. Be about an hour Annie thought. Eileen and I decided to go and look at the lake. Maria sat about in the lounge. We chatted amiably about Rob's future and decided that although his behaviour was a bit odd it was because he was young. He would be alright when he got a bit of responsibility. We would encourage him to get a job. The sun actually came out at the time we were scheduled to take the ferry trip but there was still no sign of the kids so it looked as if that bit of the day was scuppered.

Maria was looking a bit frigid when we got back. She felt we should decide about the rooms as she really needed a rest and a bath. In the end, I had to do the decent thing and give up one of the doubles to the sisters. But in any case I bagged the best single room. To hell with it, the kids could sort themselves out when they arrived. If they ever did. It was now 4 o'clock and no sign of them so I resigned myself to the fact that the event I had really looked forward to ' the ferry trip was off. I got myself a book and settled down to wait. About 6.30, decidedly disgruntled, dirty and tired, Eammon drew up. Apparently the local garage they had been recommended to had kept them waiting around ' no seats, no coffee, no tea and nowhere in the vicinity to find such luxuries. So they had to sit in the car until the mechanic was ready to change the car. Coward that I am, I left them to sort their own rooms out. Jill was a bit put out and suggested to Annie that they should double up but Annie was having none of that. Out of what they thought was my earshot she said, quite clearly, " This is Dad's stupid idea and I'm only on this trip to oblige Mum. I'm not going to be saddled with having to share with you.

This didn't go down too well with Jill but I didn't hear her reply. I thought it best to retreat to my room. We had previously agreed that we should have a drink in the bar at 7.45 so I got down there about 7.30 to order a bottle or two of champagne. This, I thought, might placate them all and oil the wheels to a reasonable dinner. Annie, Eammon, Maria and Eileen were more or less on time, although Eammon looked as if he was in a rage and Jill came down with a martyred air about five to eight. There was no sign of Rob which led to noises of disapproval from Maria. Words to the effect that she hoped we weren't going to have to wait dinner for him. Nobody volunteered to go and see where he was but after a bit Eileen decided to get reception to ring his room. A good idea ' but not so good when there was no answer.

Ever determined, Eileen thought he was probably asleep and that she would go and wake him. I wondered how he could be sleeping through the noise. Having drawn the short straw he was above the kitchen and would surely be disturbed by the noise that would emanante from there at this time , but we waited for my wife's return. She was quite a long time gone so I ordered another bottle. Anything to keep the peace during the uncomfortable prelude to dinner. When she got back, Eileen's expression was uneasy. He was not in his room. She had persuaded, with difficulty to get the Manager to open the door only to find the room empty and the suitcase unpacked.

Glancing at Maria's face, I suggested we go into dinner. In any case, if we didn't the kitchen would probably close. Should he come back in the next half hour, all well and good. If not he could have something in his room The dinner didn't go down too well. The conversation lagged, despite the wine. I kept thinking of all the wasted money and cursing my son. It seemed unlikely that he could have gone far. Both cars were still parked and there was no bus service and I was pretty sure he didn't have any friends in this part of the world. Dinner over, we repaired to the bar again. It was now 10.30 . Then the sound of a motor bike and Rob's voice saying "Great, that was really great. See you later

He must have gone straight to his room and his mother followed him. The others went to bed while I waited for Eileen. She came back, this time with a completely dazed expression. Some story about one of the waiters that he knew and they had gone out for a drink and he had forgotten the time. When he realised he was too late for dinner he had something to eat in the pub. Eileen was furious. Rob, seemingly, mildly amused. Dinner would have gone much more smoothly without him in any case, he told her. What was the problem? I was pretty mad myself but I was at least relieved that he had a reasonable story for his absence and that he had come back at a decent hour. He was probably right. Dinner might have been a bit of a strain but the idea had been to use the food and the wine to try and sort out the family's difficulties. I cursed the fact that Maria had commandeered my room. I would have liked to discuss the whole thing with Eileen but I could hardly do it in the middle of the coffee drinking clientele so we decided the best thing would be to go our separate ways and try and get Rob to talk to us in the morning.

I had a restless night. Not only was I not used to sleeping alone, I was worrying about the next day. How would breakfast be with no alcohol to oil the wheels. In any case I wondered if Rob would appear. This outing had completely lost its point. Everyone was fed up; Eileen because the plan hadn't worked, me because of the totally unnecessary expense and the others because they had been dragged all the way up here to no avail. Probably the only person who was at ease was Rob.

We, as expected, with the exception of Rob drifted, down to a silent breakfast. Maria said little but her expression said it all. Eammon, still obviously in a temper, stirred the waters by declaring that he wanted to get back home as soon as possible and he didn't intend to wait for ever. If Rob wanted a lift then he'd better appear pretty sharpish. I looked at Eileen. This outing could end as a complete disaster if we had to take Rob home with Maria and I couldn't see Maria accepting a ride in Eammon's car. But Eileen didn't react. It seemed the only thing to do was for me to try and wake Rob. I wondered what the hell I was going to find when I got to his room. Would he be completely out of it. Was he taking drugs? I had no experience , and didn't know whether he would be on this planet or another. I knocked. There was, of course, no answer and I too had to go through the humiliation of finding the manager to ask him to let me in Rob's room. As I waited at the reception, a boy approached me and asked me if I was Rob's father. I said "yes and he introduced himself as Peter. He said "I've got a key. I can let you in. I thought this odd but thought he must be part of the management. Gratefully, I followed him back to and into Rob's room. Rob was fast asleep.

"He's always like this Peter said, "I have the devil's own job to get him out of bed at any time of the day. But its probably my fault because, as you know, I have to work nights and he will insist on waiting till I get home. I tried to take this in as Peter started to shake Rob, calling to him to get out of bed. Rob woke, smiled at Peter and reached up to kiss him. Trying not to show any signs of shock I told him Eammon wouldn't wait. He seemed totally unconcerned. "That's O.K. I'll go home on Peter's bike. We'd had a row and he followed me up here. It's fine now, so I can go back with him.

I nodded. What else could I do. Was this worse than drug dealing. Did any of the others know? How would Eileen take it? She couldn't have known surely she would have told me. Wasn't it usual to tell your parents before introducing the boy friend? Did Rob think he had already made it clear? I got back to the dining room. Eileen and Maria were still sitting at the table. "The others have gone Eileen said "Eammon wouldn't wait and Jill wanted to get home. We'll have to take Rob.

Glancing at Maria's face my shock abated somewhat. I think I felt a little smug. "No we won't, I said. Pausing for dramatic effect "His boy friend's going to take him back.

An outing! Most certainly.