Contra Natura

We don't all want to.
We don't slaver and shiver at the prospect.
I know you've been told
by a thorough cross-section of media and mates
that to offer it once
is to snag us for life, as if
that same taut spirograph of muscle
will clamp on
once I'm inside, binding you,
me and the A & E guy.
I know the sensation
will no doubt be akin
to hundred-hand-slap masturbation
and it's wild like Jimmy
cos we'll use KY Jelly
and what's wrong with me, don't I LIKE your arse?
I just never considered it, really.