Decrepitude

Cherry

By Dynamaso

Thu, 19 Jun 2008
  • 2040 reads
5 comments
 

In the back lot

Behind an old grease factory
A hulking metal shell
Is trying its hardest to return
To the earth from where it once came

Rust flowers on its doors
Have blossomed and climbed
Up its pillars and onto the roof
Blooming brilliant red and orange in the sun

Sills have fallen through
Leaving rusted holes to be filled
By the flowers of weeds
Prettier than any money could buy

Rainbows of refracted light
Resting on the faded, torn seats
Cast by the in-fun smashed windscreen
Caused by those who still know what its like

To be young

Certificate U
Poem
Poetry & Song Lyrics
Miscellaneous

Comments

Submitted by jennifer on
I am wondering how metaphorical this is... ambiguity I love that word... Are you referring to yourself, Dy, or am I over-reading? The imagery is powerful in the extreme, and I particularly loved the layout.

 

Submitted by Dynamaso on
Jen, I wrote this some time ago. I remember seeing a car in this state and being completely taken by its beauty, even though it was falling to bits. But the ambiguity is delicious, I think. I'm pleased you enjoyed this. Nathan, thanks very much for your comments. I am humbled you think so highly of it, given the quality of poets writing on this site.

 

Submitted by sunshine on
superb, deserving of the accolades and cherries. That pause at the end is soooo effective. Margot

Submitted by onemorething on
It is an excellent poem. I, like Margot, particularly liked the last stanza and ending. I wondered about the frequent repetition of 'flowers' and if in the third stanza it might read better if it was simply, 'Prettier than any money could buy'.

 

Submitted by Dynamaso on
Margot, thanks very much. I wasn't sure about the pause but it has proved popular. Doeslittle, you know, I think you are right. I'm going to take the second 'flower' out. It does seem almost superfluous. Thanks for this and for commenting.