Good Grief
By Gunnerson
These are mostly short stories of fiction that I put together in a collection, written between 1999 and 2007. As I build my ABCtales collection, a few chapters from novels may appear. I'm not averse to rants and raves, either.
What genre? I've never been much good at describing my own work. It's usually pretty dark, normally about society's shortcomings but with a twist of humour to keep an even keel.
I've always wanted to write for TV; a nice hour-long Play For Today. Most of the stories would squeeze into an hour's worth of telly.
Not the most bubbly ra-ra networker, this is the first time I've joined a writers' site. Here goes..let's just hope I don't slit my wrists after the vitriol in your cutting analyses of my work has finally sunk in.
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- 1997 reads
Beans on Toast
Looking for goodies in the dustbin of life
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- 10 comments
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- 3010 reads
'Do you suffer from depression?'
‘Do you suffer from depression?’ she asked. ‘Well..,’ I began, but there was more.
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- 3 comments
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- 1255 reads
'Your Missions Will Be Saving American Lives'
Jason Bourne makes James Bond look like Ed Milliband with a tampon up his arse. Bourne’s musical score’s much more edgy. Bond’s sounds like the looping of an old lady’s fart.
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- 6 comments
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- 1600 reads
200 red words
200 red words
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- 2 comments
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- 1485 reads
2013
I don’t know why I did it. Actually, that’s a lie. It was the money. Root of all evil and all that.
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- 11 comments
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- 3133 reads
A Historical Day For A Better England
Nick Clegg reminiscing his first day as Deputy PM
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- 2 comments
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- 1140 reads
A Long Time Coming
It is said that, over the course of this year, 3500 people will sleep rough in London.
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- 807 reads
A poem, by Deadend Jobsworth, MP
My dear friend, Deadend Jobsworth of Gluttonbury, MP for Numberwang, has penned a poem in memory of Rudyard Kipling’s ‘If’.
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- 977 reads
A Quiet Riot
A searching and fearless moral inventory of our great land's character defects, as told by a defecting spy who wishes to remain anonymous
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- 8 comments
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- 1949 reads
Adam's End -London's latest art phenomenon
A London art gallery is displaying an erect penis from the body of a sex addict.
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- 7 comments
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- 2378 reads
Addressing the Concerns of the Inconsolable
Leon’s eyes popped open.
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- 6 comments
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- 1858 reads
Alan is an Ambulance!
People are very careless when they want to be. Take Alan, a friend who works hard and likes a bargain.
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- 720 reads
Cash Cow
God, I was stupid. I don’t know how I got into it and I know it’s easy to blame things on people but you know what boyfriends are like. One thing leads to another and then you’re hooked.
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- 1 comment
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- 1173 reads
Comedy persona for Mr Steve Coogan
Male; Ronald Dollar, aged 46.
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- 1091 reads
Cut and Shut
Doom and gloom
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- 3 comments
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- 1356 reads
David and Deirdre
David’s day started naturally enough. Being a Saturday, he took the eight-minute bath as opposed to the usual four-minute power-shower.
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- 1 comment
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- 1002 reads
Death Warmed Up
My unusual experience of the after-life
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- 2 comments
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- 1059 reads
The Best Plasterer in the World
The best plasterer in the world lived in Wigan. It’s fact.
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- 8 comments
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- 7699 reads
The Calculator
The silver solar-powered calculator seemed harmless enough where it was.
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- 4 comments
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- 1617 reads
The Fast Lane
Sometimes, but not very often, adversity brings out the best in us.
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- 2 comments
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- 1563 reads
We Are But Smoke
Introduction to ‘We Are But Smoke’.
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- 2 comments
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- 1016 reads
The Elaborate Case of the Nose-Picking Killing Machine
Gerry had just retired when his wife, Hilda, died of a night-time stroke. They’d been married for forty-one years.
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- 1526 reads
Joy of Joys
The phone went. It was Boots in Putney. They’ve got my nicotine patches. I said I’d be there in a few days to pick them up.
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- 833 reads
Treading Carefully
‘You look like a street person,’ she said. ‘Funny, that,’ I replied, leaving it there. Maybe that’s why she gave the next job to someone else.
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- 745 reads
Oh Well
It was on a heady day in August that James saved a man’s life. Not unusually, he’d been drinking pretty much all day. Being a Saturday meant that he had his wages.
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- 1 comment
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- 866 reads
Dogs are Gods
DOGS ARE GODS I was always a happy and kind dog by nature, as most Labradors are.
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- 820 reads
The Importance of a Lift-Operative Explained
Deep into the worst recession in British history, it has been decided that the MPs’ lift in the Houses of Parliament is in desperate need of an operative, a button-pusher, someone to steady the ship
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- 1245 reads
The Top Ten Most Irreverent Ripostes of a Hitman to a Dead Man's Last Request
‘No, it’s Eastenders in ten minutes.’ ‘No, I’ve already done three today.’ ‘No, I’m dying for a slash.’ ‘No, you’re not a bird.’
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- 772 reads
Twitter and Bisted
Me attempting to be Sharpe's Wilt
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- 1 comment
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- 934 reads
THE VOW, or writing fiction by willing fact.
Two boys on a mission
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- 579 reads
None Of The Above
It couldn't be.
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- 2 comments
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- 1087 reads
The Time Traveller
Praying time-traveller wins gold medal and make fools of world leaders, in two parts
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- 645 reads
The Time Traveller, Part Two
The second part of the story
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- 766 reads
One For The Rude
In an affluent London village, a man of no fixed abode has been caught sleeping at Lloyds bank on the high street.
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- 1 comment
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- 852 reads
wwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Ceroc are doing one of their nights again. Loud music is in the air.
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- 6 comments
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- 5371 reads
Welcome to my world
I woke up today, as you do, and immediately remembered my last thought before going to sleep last night. If I told you what it was, you’d think I was coocoocobana.
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- 776 reads
World Cup Fever
After an exhausting day on the golf course, the England squad returned to their complex in a gleaming entourage of bullet-proof limousines.
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- 2 comments
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- 1037 reads
The Critical Sell-By Date
When I wake up and my back’s itching in the place I can’t get at, I might think of the times when I had a girlfriend to scratch it for me. ‘Up a bit, down a bit. That’s it!’
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- 5 comments
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- 1951 reads
Harmony
Started writing this after watching something on the box about William Morris.
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- 1 comment
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- 855 reads
The Nerve Centre
Parents ignore kids to develop property and go mad
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- 1 comment
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- 873 reads
The Yesteryears
my go at Stories For Pakistan.
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- 6 comments
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- 1891 reads
I Can't Believe I Can't Believe It's Not Butter.
This now has a different ending to the one I originally posted. It's about a neurotic housewife's analysis of what she believes to be a superior spread.
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- 12 comments
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- 4430 reads
Two Peas in a Pod
Light refreshment
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- 4 comments
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- 1387 reads
Tardy Reynolds
Before anyone gets any funny ideas and wrongly labels me, this is satire aimed at and taken from the dire political stance posed by an over-liberal/under-intellectual/ultra-underachieving government.
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- 3 comments
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- 1566 reads
J'Accuse!
I can’t believe this is happening. My whole world has been turned upside down by a stranger I haven’t even met.
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- 1265 reads
Lord Atichoo-Atichoo
A brave new plan for homelessness by a brave new government (reworked)
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- 707 reads
You Can't Kid a Kidder
Jim had always looked up to his father as a child. He was, after all, a high-ranking police officer, a man admired and revered by all.
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- 4 comments
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- 2413 reads
The Big Society Explained..... part one
The first of two installments on the Big Society. The first is based on life today and the second a speculative picture of the near future.
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- 1021 reads
Shhtchwong
A weepy with an uplifting ending
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- 8 comments
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- 3061 reads
Just another day in paradise
‘Just another day in paradise,’ Hamish hummed as he entered the state-of-the-art council buildings.
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- 3 comments
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- 1199 reads
Kelvin's Story
A crime that goes right
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- 12 comments
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- 4182 reads
Wayne Kerr
A super-injunction scenario seen through the eyes of a young, impressionable girl following an affair with a football star.
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- 3 comments
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- 1266 reads
Nothing Changes If Nothing Changes
A fly saves a marriage.
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- 9 comments
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- 2600 reads
General Knowledge
Never the twain shall meet in humanity
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- 1 comment
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- 1045 reads
Technology Has Its Uses
Death-tech anarchists rule the roost.
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- 6 comments
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- 1857 reads
Let's Start Again, Mr Cameron
A letter from a pleading child
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- 9 comments
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- 3221 reads
Here One Day, Gone The Next
You were taken from this world by a sick man without conscience, who was free to kill for years and years, free to laugh as his comic strip unfolded, all but encouraged by the hapless brigade of blind
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- 6 comments
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- 1728 reads
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