The Power Of The People

There once was an evil witch named Theresa who had a money tree; a tree with banknotes for leaves, jewels for fruit and bark of gold and the money tree made the witch and her evil friends very rich.
But the money tree poisoned the land in which it grew so that nothing else could grow and it would only grow if it was watered with human tears and so Theresa collected the tears of the people she ruled over to water the tree, making their lives incredibly hard so that they would weep more tears.
But then a man named Jeremy thought that the money from that tree should be used to help the people of the land rather than going into the pockets of just a wealthy few and so he set out to pick money from the money tree.
And with him he took a ballot box filled with the voices of the people.
But as he journeyed towards the garden where the money tree grew Theresa watched him, sitting upon her throne and stroking the fluffy head of her pet Boris.
"Mugglewump!", said Boris.
"Thats right Boris", said Theresa, throwing back her head and laughing evilly, "That Jeremy hasn't got a chance against me. I'm strong and stable and he's a chaotic fool".
But Theresa was afraid that the voices of the people in the ballot box would give Jeremy power and so she sent out a flock of flapping newspapers led by the Newspaper king Rupert to sing out lies that would turn the people against Jeremy.
"He's a friend to terrorists", they said, "He can't defend you".
But the people knew Jeremy too well to believe the lies. They knew that he was really a friend of the people and that Theresa, with the terrible austerity she would inflict upon them to feed her money tree, was a kind of terrorist too.
So Theresa tried to distract the people by showing them what appeared to be a greater monster than her, the Brexit.
"Jeremy can't handle the Brexit. Only I can do that", she told them, "Because I'm strong and stable".
And at first, people were afraid of the Brexit and thought that only Theresa was strong enough to handle it but when she was challenged to come out and face Jeremy, she refused to because she knew that she was not really strong and stable but weak and wobbly, always making U-turns instead of standing firm and people realized, "She can't handle the Brexit. She's not strong and stable at all but the queen of lies".
And not only that, the people knew that they had as much to fear from her as they did from the Brexit.
"Whatever happens with the Brexit", they said, "If Theresa stays in power she'll make our lives miserable just to feed her money tree".
So finally, Theresa got out her nuclear trident.
"You're forked now, Jeremy", she said, raising the trident and aiming it towards him, ready to unleash a first strike against him.
But then Jeremy opened up the ballot box containing the voices of the people and all the voices rushing out of the box said the same thing, "We don't want Theresa. We want Jeremy".
And the voices of the people were like a hurricaine blowing the evil witch Theresa and her nuclear trident away.
And after that, Jeremy shook the money tree and though it didn't want to let go of its money it had to, then Jeremy used that money to help the people of the land and after that the money tree was never again watered with tears of sadness but only with tears of joy.