Samanta, Our tears never dried

Samanta, Our tears never dried

P K Routray

 

 

Never graduated, the best graduate,

never aged a teenager aging with his classmate.

never parted the Alma-mater her alumnus the best,

never completed his books with no page left for the test,

to all grieving companions, he is Srinivas, the blest

who continues to haunt many for their life, the rest.

Intriguing remained his deeds, justified or erred in haste.

since five decades to find his logic, wanders my quest.

A frail teenager with the sprouting beard

timid look, rustic gait and posture feared

apprehensions aplenty, fortitude infinite

passionate to rise with the sky as the limit

on 1st July 1965 - for all of us a memorable day

began Samant along with us his five years’ stay

at our Alma-mater to shape his destiny

to the need of his parents and well-wishers many.

Thus started our voyage ahead together

with awful exposure to seniors’ torture

the tradition we never violated to nurture

through funny acts of whims as a senior is the master.

In both roles, to each other, we keenly have seen

Samant’s in particular dance in my memory screen

humbly enacting the order as a fresher,

ruthlessly enforcing it as a senior, the master.

The obscene of the scenes by a fresher

at the behest of Samanta’s stern order

though ineffable, in me still flutter

The fresher now retired from a top managerial post

with a reputation of a hard taskmaster to the most.

Samant’ philosophy “Ragging makes a fresher tough

after all, life is not a bed of roses, it is always rough..”

But later as a student only that he failed to withstand.

He proved “Preaching and practice differ in their stand.

His meteoric rise after his entry in the college

no brickbat, nor backbiting could damage.

nor his extracurricular acts could dampen

rather they all aided him, his tenacity, to sharpen.

To his misfortune and to my good fortune

I observed closely his logics beyond human

as his roommate, laboratory mate for a year.

His never faltered tenacity with purpose, I revere.

Practicing problems from my book when I am asleep

he awed me by his love for all branches as true and deep.

Till his last, in table tennis as opponent and partner

over T T Board we spent time playing against each other.

But regret I, at me with my displeasure

as always in past, of my victory, I was sure

last game I did not mind losing him with the blunder

but never came again the opportunity to replay

that I still long to repeat the feat of losing with joy.

Alas! I hear from the graveyard Samant telling “No”

as always he wanted true battle and fair show.

With him over two years of my close association,

many chats, incidents Samant at the center in me, run.

His class notes revealed his power of concentration,

his classroom sincerity, to teachers his dedication

as those were sufficient, better than any preparation

Repent I as they were not reserved for an exhibition.

As his laboratory partner

I have seen his expression of anguish and anger

when absurd is the experimental figure.

He used to break the instruments for the error.

Frenzied deeds indeed but he has a point to offer.

To our wonder

worth to reflect and plunder

as Memento, our souvenir

on us,a parting reminder

exhibits Srinivas and Sashi lying over each other

as if the best graduateship is being handed over

It is not a by chance the big bang theory of creation

but each has a purpose so that cosmos moves on

Samant had to go at a young age, Sashi at his age

we kick on with our grandkids waiting for our voyage.

if the Hindu philosophy is true

Where will be the souls of our friends two?

Recollect I with a fond memory

Samant’s philosophy and his theory.

on friends repeating examinations

on their way to get through to graduation

“None will marry a failure

wretched will be their future.”

But Murty’s success story

proves wrong Srinivas theory

pushing me to ponder over

the underlying tone of our scripture

on wisdom, deeds, and success

too difficult was Samant to assess

On one life or on one birth or many

to divinity and great Rishis acting funny.

The sensation on my elbow

proudly all these years I see and show

not for touching the scarf of a girl of the junior section

but on it, Ssamant’s subsequent kisses of passion

His run on a challenge to kiss an unknown girl

many such incidents with his fun and frolic in me, swirl.

His last appeal to me, for some time to spare

that his drooping spirit he can take care

sweating overplaying table tennis for an hour or so

agreed readily by me that I reflect and thank the Lord now

As the final examination was drawing nigh

with subjects forgotten memories dry

after reading and rereading with their scanty effect

sleep, worries anxieties apprehensions did affect.

Thus also complained he on his sleepless nights

in spite of doctors’ treatment and his helpless fights

that I ignored then as the effect of load of the course

which like every year would ease out by our mental force

Hey Srinivas!

With you, I want to converse

heart to heart as we did often

before I book my mortal coffin

I want to apprise you, what happened after you

on the happenings and my limited view

After you departed all on a sudden

all in alma-mater were crestfallen

Principal, Professors, staff and students

mourned for you and pitied your parents.

Shocked were your parents and kith and kin

after months with them, you would have been

earning handsomely to fill their need to exist

with pride of your chair highlighted in their list

that they waited long five years

but the news brought blood in their tears.

Over the days, months and years

everything the scythe of time blears.

So also blurred you barring from your parents’ duo

lived they their wretched life with tears’ flow.

On our classmates, I must touch upon

as they frequented in our earlier discussions

some went for job, some for higher education

all with the ultimate purpose of materialistic possessions

some were capable to add name and fame to remunerations

but at this threshold of exit thus is my conclusion

nothing more, nothing better than man common

running after happiness peace and bliss

that really all of them did miss

mislead by materialistic pleasure

recording their misdeeds in His Ledger.

None even there could reach at the materialistic height

Only the Lord can name those whose deeds were right.

We all served ourselves first then only to a sector

by our likes and dislikes with wisdom under the blur

Mayadhar, Ashoka are trying at the spiritual sector

Did you foresee it and thus avoided commuting the blunder?

Look at our fifty years’ contribution

that everywhere harm the creation.

Whatever we took over from our ascendant

wretched we made them for our descendant

with global warming, carbon deposit

dry rivers, dwindled forests, water deficit.

Being the best among us, did you perceive it?

At this exit hour, our failure to you I admit.

Let me go out of a divine discussion with divinity

listen to how we lived all these years spanning over fifty.

Through assignments to earn our bread and butter

with spouses and then expanded the family to look after

with a new society, new peers and own weal and woes

passed we our fifty years and to our end we are close.

For their heavenly abode, forty friends have left us

each of them are in our prayer as friend ponderous.

Some of the rest have forgotten the teenager bondage

They are tied only to their own family with own lineage.

Rest with their spouses sing and dance often together.

The reminiscence of college days repeated with pleasure.

A sea change in the physical frame

in your classmates whomsoever you name.

Their lush black hairs have turned grey

color they hairs to keep old age at bay

or have vanished from the root making scalp barren

making it an Indian tabla for their grandchildren.

The teeth once breaking bones are broken from the bone

the joints thrilled to jump and hop now with pain moan

Limbs are limping and some seek for donor

some lost their spouses, some are still a bachelor.

An ocean change in emotional characters of many

so close so friendly in college days now act funny.

Some refuse to recognize

as for them, forgetfulness bring them the prize

as fickle friends cause injury to their social status

call we them we psyche nervous.

but wish we them the best

after all they are friends sharing the same vest.”

Since fifty years

haunt me his facial features

pale with pathos

begging goodbye from us

acknowledging his failure

to battle the earthly struggle any longer.

he left no spouse to cry

no progeny and grandkids to sigh

kith and kin and friends

forgot him passing through numerous bends

Alas! Samant is left forlorn.

Samant never mourn

you at heart we adorn

you are a genius born.

We pray for you

life after life it will continue

for peace and bliss to your soul

and to merge with the ultimate and Whole.

 

 

(N . B - Srinivas samanta was our classmate wef 1965 to 1970. He was topper all previous four years and tipped to be the best graduate. He committed suicide just a few months before final examinations. I t is in his memory. Sashi cited in the poem became the best graduate but has expired in mystic circumstances,)