Kodak- I want my pictures

Dear Mr Kodak,

Memories, like the corners of my mind, nothing more but memories of my
day at Bangor's Wheel Tapper's and Shunter's annual exhibition.
Yes, memories are all I have.

Being a member of Greenpeace and Friends of the Earth I took it upon
myself to purchase one of your environmentally friendly 'Disposable
Cameras'.
I had an exciting day watching the experts, wheel tapping and shunting
and I took twenty five wonderfully interesting photographs with your
camera. After this I disposed of the camera as its title suggests but I
am still waiting in anticipation for my photographs to be returned to
me.
Now, after disposing of my camera into the nearest rubbish bin, I
started to think. I realised I had neglected to write my name and
address onto it, so how would you get my photos to me? You see my
mother always does this for me ie: in my mittens, jacket and
satchel.
To help with identification of the said missing photographs please find
the following itemised description , may I add it is of the utmost
importance that I get these back before anyone sees them.

1. Me and the President of the wheel Tapper's and Shunter's
Association.

2. Me and the Vice President of the Wheel Tapper's and Shunter's
Association.

3. Me and the Treasurer of the Wheel Tapper's and Shunter's
Association.

4. Me holding the 2001 Shunter's Challenge Cup ( red and white ribbons,
but plastic looking).

5. Me and Ernest Bagshaw stroking his dog.

6. Me and Ethel Bagshaw stroking Ernest's dog.

7. The President of the Wheel Tapper's and Shunter's Association
stroking Ernest Bagshaw's dog.

8. The Vice President of the Wheel Tapper's and Shunter's Association
stroking Ernest Bagshaw's dog.

9. Me and Ernest Bagshaw sharing a Pate sandwich from his
lunchbox.

10. Me and Ernest Bagshaw sharing a Cheese sandwich from my lunch
box.

11. Ethel Bagshaw with her hand in my lunchbox.

12. Me and Ernest in the bar.

13. Me and Ernest having a drink at the bar. Cheers mate!

14. Me and Ernest having another drink at the bar. Cheers hic !
mate!

15. Me and Ernest Bagshaw, my old mate, good old buddy having one for
old time sake, , at the bar?.

16. Me at the bar whilst Ernest is in the toilet.

17. Me at the bar with Ethel Bagshaw, having a drink, whilst Ernest is
still in the toilet.

18. Me dancing with Ethel, my good old friend, in the bar.

19. Ernest Bagshaw on the St Johns Ambulance stretcher leaving Bangor's
Wheel Tapper's and Shunter's annual exhibition.

20. Me and Ethel waving at the St Johns Ambulance on its way to
Bangor's General hospital with Ernest inside having a suspected burst
liver and alcohol poisoning.

21. Me comforting Ethel Bagshaw.

22. Me and Ethel Bagshaw on the sharabang home.

23. Ernest Bagshaw's bedroom ceiling.

24. Me wearing Ernest's Bagshaw's dressing gown.

25. Me and Ethel Bagshaw sharing a fag.

I eagerly await the forwarding of my photographs as I have been
boasting to all my friends about my wonderful day. Sorry I meant
friend.

Yours sincerely

Ofar Quarson