Velociraptor Blues

I've got a pet Velociraptor, he's giving me the blues. You see the
problem with a 'Rappy' is they like to chew and chew. He starts off in
the morning where he digests the morning news. And with midday fast
approaching he's polished off my shoes. Then the afternoon is hellish,
as he runs among my roses; alas I have to whack him with a brush to
keep him off me posies. Now my wife comes home at half past two and she
is a saintly girl but one look at our 'Rappy' and she does get in a
stew, "he's eaten us out of house and home, so there's nothing else to
chew."I look at her dejectedly, but i haven't got a clue what to
do.

So chastened by this sombre news, and a frank exchange of views my wife
and I recline dejected with our Velociraptor blues. But he's such a
happy fellow when there's plenty for him to chew, i remember the day
quite vividly when the Mother-in-law arrived unexpectedly from Crewe,
'Rappy' was in his element, she took a whole week to chew all the way
through.

We even took him to church one day, and what did he go and do he
frightened all the worshipers and demolished all the pews. To give our
vicar credit though and pay him all his dues, when faced with such
traumatic news, he said, " Don't worry perhaps the time had come, when
all seating needed to be renewed."

My pet Velociraptor is looking kind of blue, he knows he's been a
naughty boy, but what is he to do? Mother nature made him thus so to go
against would be cruel. And now his look is menacing and giving me a
clue, am I going to be the one to rue, and be the victim of a
Velociraptors blues?