Small

Cherry

By Bee

Mon, 02 Feb 2015
  • 4355 reads
18 comments
 

Fleet, the flicker wings
at cornered sight,
that trill thrilled song
to humbled heart
where blinked glimpse
makes a moment great
when spotting Jen
under overgrowth
of dreary winter garden. 

Certificate U
Poem
Nature

Comments

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

Oh, I love the sight of them, and as you say the gardens do look drear at the moment and so you the more appreciate an unusal sight, and that little tail does help to recognise. Lovely picture, and lovely little verse. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks Rhiannon. They are lovely little things, aren't they?

Bee

Submitted by Philip Sidney on

Your poem is small and compact , like a wren, so small and so lovely.

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks Philip - that's really nice of you.

Bee

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks kind Editor, for the cherries.

Bee

Submitted by a102866 on

 I love the fleeting frill that you have appended to the dreary season of winter. Just a glimpse, just one shrill note can suffice. Enjoyed your poem!

Submitted by Bee on

Hi a102866, really glad you liked it. I've just looked outside and it's snowing - that's perked things up a bit. Nothing dreary about fresh snow. Not for me, anyway - tucked up warm at home. I love it. Thank you for reading, and for such nice comments.

Bee

Submitted by jeand on

Hi Bee

Lovely little poem. Are you a regular bird watcher?

Jean

Jean Day

Submitted by Bee on

Thanks Jean - glad you liked it. I do so love birds. 

Bee

Submitted by Geoff Smith on

It's really nice Bee. I'm exraordinarily tired at the mo... hence lack of ABC activity... so this might be total nonsense, but what do you think of:

makes a moment
spotting Jen

for lines 7 and 8? Just wondered about the rhythm of that bit... but very tired as I say.

Thanks for reading. I am grateful for your time.

Submitted by Bee on

Hi Geoff - not nonsense at all. I'll have a play around with that tomorrow. I'll just tell you what I was thinking, though, to see if you think it makes sense. 'blinked glimpse
makes a moment great... ' - I wanted the 'great' because it's big, even though the moment, blink, glimpse and the bird are small. Thank you so much for thinking about it, I really appreciate it - good suggestion.

 

Bee

Submitted by Stephen Thom on

 trill thrilled song...perfect three words. this is lovely, i love reading the poetry here, love that you can freeze these moments and stretch time this way and constantly reaffirm the wonder in the small things, and therefore everything...'makes a moment great'. keep up the wonderful work

 

Submitted by Bee on

Hi Stephen.

I loved what you said about poetry being able to freeze moments and stretch time. Thank you for your encouragement. 

Bee x

Ps. I've been listening to your music - it's really good - I loved it.

Bee

Submitted by Stephen Thom on

yes thankyou for having a listen Bee super glad you enjoyed :-)

 

Submitted by Bee on

Hi Stephen.

I sent you a private message after I listened - I wonder if you got it. The only reason I ask is that if ever I've sent a PM, I've never had a reply in the last year, or so. I do receive them though. 

I'm a bit of a folkie, myself - (song, guitar+ flute) so your music is right up my street. I hope others get to listen to yours - it's great, and I'd love to hear you in concert one day. 

Bee

Submitted by Stephen Thom on

hi Bee, no, i haven't received any private messages, sorry! I would def reply. That's great to hear about your musical side - I am a guitarist too, but I have enjoyed learning a bit of mandolin for this band...it might be a while 'til we get out of Scotland but I can certainly send you our CD if you ever like. We have loads spare, haha. :-)

 

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

What a beautiful poem Bee.  Being a lover of birds of all description,  I was drawn to your poem and so glad I found it.

Thank you for sharing your words.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by Bee on

So pleased you liked it, Jenny - after all, little Jenny wren is really named after you, isn't she. I love birds, too - always such a thrill to watch their antics. I've got gold finches in the garden at the moment - they are my favourite, I think. Thank you for your lovely comments.

Have a relaxing Sunday,

Bee