Day 30
By brighteyes
- 939 reads
Andaw
"Cancer? Insa's eyes are huge. "How do you know you're going to get cancer?
"Zoom said she had it.
"Who?
"Zoom magazine. Shots of her going into the clinic off Tombawley Street. Besides, their fact checkers are legendary.
"Who did? Andaw, who's got cancer?
"Someone I know. Someone you probably know, in fact.
"I don't understand. We only met in the last few weeks. I don't know any of your friends.
"She's not exactly a friend.
"A lover?
"Hardly. Insa, please. You asked me to tell you, so let me.
"Sorry, sorry, but who? What is this all about?
"Insa, you asked why I looked like this. Well, it's my job to.
She leans back in her chair, head tilted, frowns, then darts back at me, mouse-eyed.
"Go on then!
"How to explain this? You - hmm...you know how bodyguards throw themselves in front of bullets for government officials?
"Yeah -
"No wait, that's far too glamorous. It's more like the type of person who trips up and falls out of their dress at red carpet events to make their employer's spinach teeth disappear from the radar.
"A lackey.
"A crossing sweeper, to be exact.
I draw breath, ready to give a scholarly definition, when she surprises me.
"You're a crossing sweeper? Fuck, so it is going on! That explains everything!
"You know about Gray's?
"Gray's, Peaches & Cream, Facefortuna, Marley... She snouts about in her bag and pulls out a battered notebook. "Yes, you could say that. If my Mum wasn't so wrapped up in curing Cadderine, she might have noticed that I've been spending hours and hours researching these people.
She looks at me straight on.
"I'm not a total vegetable, you know. I'm not half bright when I put my mind to it, and my memory is, well. I can remember the first page of the first storybook I ever read.
"Which was? I test her.
Channel 22
"Snow White.
"Thank you again Ms Calless. For those of you just joining us, we're in for a treat later on in the show, when Brenya Calless will be telling us the classic tale of Snow White. First, though, a couple of questions for you, fun ones. Number one: Snow White or Wicked Queen?
"Let's ask the kids, shall we?
[CHEERS]
"Woah there kids! We get the message! Snow White it is. Why is that, do you think? Do you happen to have seven short friends squirreled away at the mansions? Do you like apples?
"Ha ha, of course not. It's because she's so pretty! Isn't that right kids? She's much prettier than the wicked queen, locked away in her castle!
[CHEERS]
"Well I guess that settles it. On to the next quickfire question: glass coffin or regular?
Andaw
"So who is she? Your sweepee?
"I don't know.
"Bollocks. You always swap your cup from right to left hand when you're lying.
I lower my left hand to the table, the chai cup coming to rest.
"Well then, maybe that was a polite way of saying that I can't tell you. Data protection.
"Come off it. That's just so the press don't leap on it, and odds are they already know.
"I'd rather not say.
"You've suddenly gone all quiet. Why is that?
"Insa, let it drop.
"Someone I know, someone I know. Who do I know who's rich enough to have a crossing sweeper?
A muffled beep comes from the depths of her bag, and the foraging begins afresh.
"There was that girl Mum used to know in college who went on to make millions by patenting some kind of vaginal plug...Ah!
Her face greened by the tiny glow from the phone's screen, is suddenly bleached of expression and she looks positively ill as a thumb on autopilot scrolls through the message. After a moment, I take the phone, and she remains still, hand propped up like a novelty cigarette holder, as I read:
INSA HAV GON AWAY THAT WOMANS DRIVIN ME MAD WHERES MY PA WITH SHOOTING SCHEDULES? AM GOING FOR MY NEXT XPOSURE SESSION ON FRI SHOULD B TOTAL SUCCESS. THE PAPERS WONT NEED TO SPECULATE NE MORE N DOC SAYS IM HELPING SUFFERERS FIND A CURE BY BECOMING A HOST. ALL HUSH HUSH BUT I FEEL LIKE I JUST BCAME THE BUTTERFLY I NU I WAS. MG xxx
"M.G.? I ask, confused.
"It's Cadderine, she answers quietly. "I underestimated her. She's sicker than I thought. She's accessorised her Gilligan costume with a fucking tumour.