Waiting

By celticman

Mon, 09 Nov 2015
  • 1866 reads
10 comments
 

Fog clouds and claws

Cling-things of the flesh

Earth a smoking pit

Mountains made to fit

Unmanable things as sea

Albino plants  

Fallen lies of the land

Myths of sky

Shy colour blue

Cancerous white flow

City-eye glow

Candles of flowers

Velvet hours tumbling down

Fallen into a drunken stupor

Cleave shudder and still

Too late

Wait

Certificate U
Poem
Philosophy

Comments

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

I could  feel a train of musings in this piece Jack. Letting the mind guide you is the best way to go.

Shifting thoughts like the eb and flow of the tide.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by Jane Hyphen on

Like a row of standing dominos falling, each line freeing up the next one - neat.

 

Submitted by celticman on

cheers jenny and jane. I guess when you think about fog, you don't think about fog. 

 

Submitted by blackjack-davey on

cling things of the flesh-- sounds like a good title for Stephen King

fog turns us all into wraiths

never thought of it clawing before but will rethink

 

Submitted by celticman on

Dean Koonz done a book/film the fog. I remember it had Jamie Lee Curtis before she bacame Jamie Lee Curtis. Hokum. But I guess I'm just tossing words up in the air. 

 

Submitted by Pat G on

Tense and threatening, with its tightness of language.

Submitted by Deliberately Ev... on

I love all the colourful descriptions - they make the poem feel like a painting 

The beat of your heart is the mellifluent rhythm to my soul.

Submitted by celticman on

thanks guys, may good things creep up on you too. 

 

Submitted by Bee on

Scary and threatening. There's a threat in that ending. I liked the descriptions, too. 

Bee

Submitted by celticman on

cheers bee