Circle of life

By Granny to the rescue1

Mon, 25 Jan 2016
  • 2041 reads
10 comments
 

In this world, world we have,
have a while, while we live,
live in air, air we breathe,
breathe in life, life we make,
make our way, way in time,
time to live, in this world.

In this world, world we had,
had a while, while we lived,
lived with air, air we breathed,
breathed in life, life we made,
made our way, way in time,
time to live, live and died.
in this world.

Certificate U
Poem
Inspiration Point (work that responds to our weekly writing cue)

Comments

Submitted by Rhiannonw on

A clever idea, worked through, and gently thought-provoking. Rhiannon

 

Submitted by Granny to the r... on

Thanks. I like to try new ideas.

Submitted by maisie on

its kinda deep on the surface and I wonder if it could be sung in a round... 

 

maisie angel Guess what?  I'm still alive!

Submitted by Granny to the r... on

Thanks Maisie, I did think of it as a round when I first drafted it. Maybe round the edge of a page.

Submitted by Bee on

Very circular by the repetitive style. Cleverly done.

Bee

Submitted by Granny to the r... on

Thanks Bee.  I appreciate the comment.

Submitted by skinner_jennifer on

I enjoyed reading your Circle of life poem.

Jenny.

 

Submitted by Granny to the r... on

Thanks Jenny, I always try to bring enjoyment with my writing.

Submitted by loquaciousicity on

An interesting idea... It could be applied to logic or philosophy or such, giving rise to circular reasoning!

In any case, a great poem!!!

Submitted by Granny to the r... on

I write for pleasure, never delving too deep into the way my brain churns out the words, so if I hit upon a philosophical or logical formula it would have been purely by accident. But thanks anyway Permalink you are too kind..