iMistletoe

iMistletoe

i hate that combination of mistletoe

and the office party

gross sweaty accountant blokes

in hand knit cardigans

with their beery breath or

smooth talking sales execs

drenched in after shave

and a love of themselves

think mistletoe has magic qualities

that when activated by a wet slobbery

snog i will somehow automatically

develop an uncontrollable urge to

join them in a travelogue or

more likely a quickie in

the cupboard where the cleaning stuff is kept

can i give ‘im a sharp kick on the shin

my knee in his special place

dent the crown jewels

scratch his smarmy face

instead

two heads’ of departments groped

my bum and our creepy boss made me

sit on his lap ho ho ho

i escaped to the loo and made a sample

then topped-up their wine with the essence

of drew

i hate mistletoe

it fills me with dread