For the Billy Basics

If you wanna be a soldier
then first, you gotta hold ya'
gun right; don't shoot sloppy
else mum'll be plantin' you a poppy.
At your age, that ain't right '
you need to make sure you're alright.

Second, you gotta rememba
this job ain't easy; speshly in Decemba.
We don't want no moaning' tho,
else pack up your kit and go.
You gotta harden yourselves up, lads;
you'll be killas before you're dads.

Third, you gotta wear that cammo
it's almost as good as yer ammo
Whack that khaki and cream on
an' don't wash 'til the foe's gone.
Get down low, keep it slow.
Before they expect it, bomb, blast, blow!

Fourth, make sure to wear yer dog tag
in case you wind up in a body bag.
We don't want ya mums to mourn
over a lad that ain't 'er spawn
'cause her lad didn't bovver to care
'bout the ID he was 'sposed to wear

Now, if yer knees go weak as jelly
an' there's butterflies in yer belly
just look around atcha peers
you ain't the only one with fears.
It's fuckin' hard, I won't lie
but make sure you keep those spirits high.

Sometimes, yer mates are gonna get 'urt
It's at these times you hit the dirt.
You basics have gotta understand
Stick togetha, but know when to disband.
Yer not always able to save who ya like
It's a shame, but you might havta leave Tom, Harry and Mike.

Now comes the end of my spiel.
I ain't told you a great deal
you don't already know
so go give them fuckers some woe!
Betta make sure your uniforms are starch,
'tention comp'ny, quick march!