DEATH OF A POET

Cherry

By Linda Wigzell Cress

Tue, 30 Oct 2012
  • 2792 reads
8 comments
 

The poet’s heart is beating fast –
He cries aloud with fear and rage:
His hand lies still upon the page
Until the pain has passed.
He takes a pen; the die is cast.
He writes as if a war to wage.
Like doves freed from a prison cage
His thoughts are free to fly at last.
He writes til he can write no more
And sunny day becomes dark night.
The life in him wanes with the light;
His pulse is weak, his eyes grow dim.
He falls down, lifeless, to the floor –
His pen the sword that slayed him.

Certificate U
Poem
POETRY
Unclassified

Comments

Submitted by celticman on
yeh, I really like this, but I think it loses a bit at the end, which is a bit melodramatic?

 

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
Hi Celticman. I tend to agree with your comment. This was written for a competition with a dramatic IP. I was not totally happy with it and may re-work it later. Thanks for reading and commenting. I appreciate your interest. Linda

Linda

Submitted by Denzella on
Linda, I really like this. I think it is a clever piece of writing. First the rhyming scheme and then the form which I first thought was a Petrarchan sonnet except that there are not ten syllables to the line so not sure now. I have always thought you exceptionally talented at writing rhyming poetry and this is no exception. You also have a great ability to write in a formal form if that makes sense. I'm sitting here thinking surely Moya you can express yourself better than that but unfortunately...I can't! As for the ending perhaps it is a bit melodramatic but it is well prepared for with the lines 'His hand lies still upon the page Until the pain has passed.' I really enjoyed reading it. Moya
 

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
Thanks for your kind and eloquently expressed comments Moya. This was for the current competition and the IP was various images to be written in 14 line loosely sonnet type format. I think it was the Italian sonnet form I used. i have enjoyed doing this exercise so much, but am very low down in the pecking order! I am still not that happy with this poem but will reconsider later. Will come over soon, I have been rather slacking lately with my reading! Linda

Linda

Submitted by Silver Spun Sand on
I too really enjoyed this one, Linda, and the style in which it was so cleverly written. Tina

 

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
Thanks for your kind comment Tina, I am glad you liked it. Will catch up with you all soon Linda

Linda

Submitted by karl_wiggins on
Very good. I actually love the last line, and feel it could be an opening line for another poem.

 

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
Thanks Karl. This was a pentathlon poem, sonnet form with IP. I'll work on the new poem! Linda

Linda

Submitted by TheGameCat on
Hand liesn the page/until the pain has pased - is reminiscent of 'The Moving Finger writes; and, having writ, Moves on'; which is such an apt reflection given the centre of the poem. Those opening four lines I'd say are beautifully crafted. 'The life in him wanes with the light;' seems to slow the rhythm a tad, and that work for the poem as life is seeping by that time. The last line though I believe is short of a beat. Slayed I pronounce as one syllable - and Ithink this tiny fraction JUST prevents the line from fully resolving the piece. It reads strongly to my mind and jju needs a tiny tweak on the llast line, whch would take away thaight lack of resolution which is what I think causes thwhole 'melodramtic' concern. Ant, The GameCat, Smith www.antsmith.net

Ant, The GameCat, Smith
www.antsmith.net

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
HI theGameCat, and thank you for your thoughtful and detailed comments. This was a hard task in the 'poetry pentathlon'; if I remember rightly the task was to write a sonnet (14 liner) based on one of a selection of paintings. I did linger long over the last line, and am now having another think, thanks to your kind remarks. Linda

Linda

Submitted by Linda Wigzell Cress on
P.S. GameCat- You're not a David Essex fan by any chance? Linda

Linda