Outside the toilets in McDonalds

The man outside the toilets in McDonalds.

You looked at me when I walked into McDonalds. I didn't buy anything, I
never do. I just walked upstairs to use the toilet. You were sat at the
table nearest the door all by yourself. Maybe you looked at everybody
who walked in, hence choosing the table that was near the door,
therefore the look you gave me shouldn't make me feel special. But it
did do. I didn't know how to respond, should I have raised my eyebrows
in acknowledgement, given you a smile, or played it cool? I could have
playfully stolen a chip. How would you have responded if I had done?
Your face might have brightened up, it might have been the breath of
fresh air you'd been looking for, it could have cheered you up. You
certainly looked like you needed something to make you smile. Your
Happy Meal wasn't doing its job. In the time it took me to walk up the
stairs, go to the toilet, wash my hands and ignore the old man
expecting me to pay for the privilege of doing my flies down and up
again, sat with a plate overflowing with a 2p piece, my head was
already buzzing with thoughts of you.

A girl like you shouldn't be in McDonalds, you should be in the
classiest of restaurants surrounded by bottles of expensive wine,
plates full of seafood - lobster, crab, pate, waiters taking your coat
and refilling your glass. Not surrounded by spotty greasy baseball
capped nobodies, sugary coke and a cold cheeseburger. And you certainly
shouldn't be alone, sat near the door, looking at people who walk in to
buy something, or in my case use the toilet facilities. Maybe you were
only looking at me because I looked at you first - I was taken by
surprise by such a beautiful girl greeting me as I came in from the
cold. I couldn't help but look at you - maybe that's the only reason
you looked back - what I had thought was intense eye contact could
actually just have been you thinking 'why is that loser staring at
me?'

But it wasn't just for a brief moment our eyes met, if so I wouldn't
still be thinking about you now. Because when I came down the steps
your face seemed to light up as I emerged round the corner, avoiding
the 'cleaning in progress' sign which always seems to be there and
nobody ever does anything about it. I may be imagining it but I'm sure
I'm not wrong, you seemed to be waiting for me. Obviously coming down
the stairs my eyes were on you because I wanted another look at your
beautiful face. But I didn't expect to look at you and see those big
blue eyes staring back and exploring me.

Paranoia set in over whether I had done my flies up. But then that is
nothing new. There has never been a bigger contrast anywhere on earth
than looking at the old man wanting my coppers outside the toilet to
looking at your face as I reached the bottom step.

There was a chair free next to you. I really wanted to sit on it and
see how you responded. I really wish I had done. I wouldn't have known
what to say though. 'I've just had a wee' isn't the best of opening
lines. But then I think how it would be if I was sat at a table in
McDonalds by myself and a girl came and sat next to me, made small
talk, introduced herself, stole a chip. I'd have loved it.

But I did nothing, I just walked past you, opened the door and walked
back into the cold. I really hated myself because I didn't have the
balls to do anything and the realisation dawned that you would never
play a part in my life, I would never see you again. As I deliberately
went in the wrong direction so I could have a third look at you through
the window you were sat beside, eye contact number three
happened.

It made my heart beat at twice the normal rate and I imagined telling
my friends my extraordinary tale of how I met this girl in McDonalds,
how I stole a chip from her and we ended up talking. But as I walked
home, refreshed after having been to the toilet, I started to think
about the depressing bleak abyss called my future.

Maybe it's time that I took a few risks. I've been single for a long
time now and although it doesn't make me upset or miserable it can't go
on forever, and I would like something extra in my life. I need to
learn to talk to girls, to take some risks, to speculate to accumulate,
to live life to the full, to go out and find happiness in case it
doesn't find me.

Because otherwise it won't be long before it is me sat helpless outside
the toilets in McDonalds while people walk past me without putting any
money on my plate.